Remembering...

(This is a poem I posted on another account. I wrote it a few years ago so I'm trying to remember it and might not recall it word for word. I just enjoy its simplicity, hopefully you will too...)

Remembering

Remembering is bittersweet,
Like life, like love, like everything.
Look back on memories and smile,
but feel more satisfied and cry
and let it all run down your cheeks
till all your sorrows have run dry..

And when the colour in your face,
has faded back from red to fair,
smile for all your memories
and no more sorrow will you bear.


(Not trying to embedd any real deeper meaning in this, just the idea of catharsis and how often experiencing the pain of remembering something is necessary before we can really look back on it and appreciate the happiness.)

Must say, I like the simplicity of this, but I'm just a tad confused on it, though that may just be me who thinks that. As far as rhythm and grammar, there's not any problems. My only concern is that maybe at the beginning of each new line, you capitalize the first letter. The line is supposed to be the sentence of the stanza, which is the equivalent to a paragraph in a book. You always start a new sentence with a capital letter, correct?

Anyway, I still liked it. Not bad. Simple and leaves an impression. Gives the reader a taste that lingers for their own creativity to fill in.

Thanks for your feedback. I wasn't that fussed about the stanzas to behonest, I was thinking about thatwhen I wrote it up last night but I didn't reallly take the time to organise the capital letters. It wasn't my biggest concern here but I see where you're coming from.

I dont really review things, just compliment/give small pointers. It's a bit confusing but I thought it was pretty good. It gave emotion and an image (to me, at least) what you were trying to say. I liked this peice quiet a bit.

Thanks. I'm wondering what you found confusing though. Here's my simple explanation:

Essentially it's about the fact that when we remember, even good memories, even though they are happy, we can't help but feel a twinge of sadness, mourning the fact that these memories are in the past and that they cannot be recreated. So I look at the fact that maybe, the first few times we remember something particularly significant, we need to get through the sadness of remembering - and that in fact, there is a certain catharsis in feeling that sadness and in crying. (A catharsis is when you go through something that is emotionally cleansing.)

So the idea is that, after you've experienced the bitterness of remembering and had your sadness, then when you remember you can appreciate the sweetness of the memory. It's about moving on in your life, being able to fondly remember the past.

Is there anything in particular that confused you?

Great poem!! I don't see any improvement that it needs, yay!

Keep writing,
Alzora

I enjoyed this poem, its as if you've managed to fit in how a lot of people don't seem to realise how good things are when they have them and it takes the sorrow in the memories for them to fully realise how good things were. One reason I enjoyed this is that I can relate to it on some ways and I think a lot of other people will be able to as well and if a reader can make a connection to the work it tends to have a bigger impact and more significance to them than other poems they cant relate to or have no emotional attachment, so I think it was good how you managed to make it really easy for readers to relate to. I like how you didn't over complicate it or try and stretch it out so that it was too long by keeping it short and simple it has more of an effect on people than a long winded poem. Overall I think this is a good poem there's obviously room to improve like there is with everything but the more you write the better you'll get

Hey thanks glad you liked it. And yes that is the crux of it, I am ALWAYS reprimanding myself for not appreciating things when they are there and ALWAYS wanting/thinking I need more.

Wrote this a while ago so I've written stuff since. I think however more I improve though I'll never try to change this poem, like to leave it as it is! Nice and simple. Must start writing more poetry though, and hoak out whatever is buried away in my old computer.

I really liked the imagery you created. It was simple but pretty easy to follow. It left it open enough that just about anyone could relate to it, which as the reader I appreciate. I'm not really qualified enough to critique it further, but personally, I really liked it!