Screaming Underwater.

Tape over my mouth.
Not like I'd care.
Scratch it all out;
I was never there.
As far as we see,
There's nothing to see.
Ignore it all,
Just ignore me.

Censor my world,
It's okay.
Blacken the words,
It's safer that way.
Pull the wool
Over these eyes.
Naivity warms me,
Embrace me with lies.

Wow. That was... wow. It was very good, it definately portrayed the emotion you were going for if you were going for kind of dark. But it was good.

I suppose this is kind of a useless critique then, but I really have no revisions to suggest.


*adna*

Good Poem. Not my cup of tea, however, I did like it. For the type of poem that it is, I felt it was very relavent. I'm actually glad that is a short poem because if you had went any further I know I would have hated it.

Like I said, "Good Poem."

Excellent poem. It really conveyed your feelings at the time. And I agree, it was the perfect length. Anything longer would have been a bit tedious, but this made me shiver.

No grammar, spelling, or prose corrections from me. You get a gold star.

Wow, excellent job. It really conveys the emotion well. I espeically like how it rhymes, but in a way that makes sense, not overly posed or anything. It just does. It's a really good length too.

"Censor my world, Blacken the words, It's safer that way. and "Embrace me with lies" are really good lines.

wow, awesome poem loved it, I can feel exactly how you felt at teh time you were writing it when i read it....