Beautiful Imperfections

10 posts
User avatar
Gender Male
Points 1726
Reviews 266
BEAUTIFUL IMPERFECTIONS

Speak to my soul in a blaze of flaws;
a shining glory of twisted possibilities,
tears and shattered glass - fissures in a skyscraper.
Find me in a ring road of tortured concrete:
a broken circle, in a Mecca of crippled steel pylons
and soaring, fused crystal sculptures.
Set my feet on the right path: where
smoking asphalt twists the air into
..........beautiful,
............toxic,
..........ethereal,
............eidolans;
where a muddy yellow moon sends shivers of
pure radiance into a darkened warehouse,
through elegantly broken window panes.

Give me a bolt of glory to pour into a vagrants sleeping, snarled face;
.....a pure white flame to turn a broken bottle into a beacon;
..........a ray of worldly, untarnished hope to turn a shelter into a corner of heaven.
Give me a tune to set a council estate spinning;
.....shake the hard, high men in their hard, high towers;
..........rock the gates of heaven on their human foundations.
Give me a human arrow to shoot an angel,
.....a human bomb to kill a world,
..........a human spear to kill a god.
Give me a human hand to save a life,
.....a human heart to make the choice,
..........a human character to laugh at the laws that bind it.

Give me a human life: an onrushing death-train of
precluded choices, impossible dreams, and burnt out wishes.
Give me a human life to burn brighter than any spirit,
.....a mortal existence to outlast any deity,
..........a flicker to outshine any eternity.

Give me you, and give me me.
Give me us, and what we are.
Give me what we have to be, and what we always will be.

Give us ourselves;
..give us humanity;
....give us our beautiful, perfect,
imperfection.
The Oneday Cafe
though we do not speak, we are by no means silent.




Random avatar
Gender Female
Points 890
Reviews 1160
Give me a human arrow to shoot an angel,
.....a human bomb to kill a world,
..........a human spear to kill a god.
Give me a human hand to save a life,
.....a human heart to make the choice,
..........a human character to laugh at the laws that bind it.

THAT was the BEST PART!

This was a good poem... a bit long, which took me a while to read... but beautiful nonetheless... Yeah, I can't really say anything, although there were several words I had to look up on dictionary.com... such as

us
and
give




User avatar
Gender Male
Points 1726
Reviews 266
Hah.

Thanks, silver ;) much obliged to ya.

Sorry about all the dots - I couldn't get the spacing to work properly otherwise.
The Oneday Cafe
though we do not speak, we are by no means silent.




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 990
Reviews 4
:) :) :)
Last edited by _jess_ on Thu Mar 09, 2006 1:46 pm, edited 1 time in total.




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 890
Reviews 44
Whoa. Amazing poem. I-I have no criticism. Wow.
You say "crazy" like it's a bad thing...




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 890
Reviews 9
".....shake the hard, high men in their hard, high towers;
..........rock the gates of heaven on their human foundations.
Give me a human arrow to shoot an angel,
.....a human bomb to kill a world,
..........a human spear to kill a god.
Give me a human hand to save a life,
.....a human heart to make the choice,
..........a human character to laugh at the laws that bind it."

I thought this was excellent! Perfectly thought and well written.
"There is no excellent beauty that hath not some strangeness in the proportion."-Bacon
"He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you."-Nietzsche




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 890
Reviews 136
=D> Fabulous work, darhling.
:wink: Why can I never write anything constructive...*sulks*
www.myspace.com/prettytorture
felicitypepper@hotmail.co.uk

Big up the YWS Massive!

....And I still don't know what SPEW is....




User avatar
Gender Male
Points 890
Reviews 66
That was terrific. Really, it was. :thumb:

I can't pick a favourite part because.. well, I'd rather not seperate awesome lines from awesome-er ones. Hah.

In case that my response was a tad difficult to understand, I love it!
Cuz I'm praying for rain and I'm praying for tidal waves.
I wanna see the ground give way. I wanna watch it all go down.




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 890
Reviews 161
I didn't like the first stanza so much...I'm not sure why. It didn't flow so well for me. But after that it was just...wow. :shock: I mean, it was really, REALLY good. Like everyone else, my favorite part was:

Give me a tune to set a council estate spinning;
.....shake the hard, high men in their hard, high towers;
..........rock the gates of heaven on their human foundations.
Give me a human arrow to shoot an angel,
.....a human bomb to kill a world,
..........a human spear to kill a god.
Give me a human hand to save a life,
.....a human heart to make the choice,
..........a human character to laugh at the laws that bind it.

Great job. :thumb:
"All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring."
-Chuck Palahniuk




Random avatar
Gender Male
Points 890
Reviews 103
Wow...maybe a little bit of touching up here and there...but otherwise there were some beautiful stanzas. Way to use imaginative metaphorical verses to get the point across. Well done.
The individual leads in actual fact a double life, one in which he is an end to himself and another in which he is a link in a chain which he serves against his will or at least independently of his will.
--SIGMUND FREUD



Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.
— Nelson Mandela