delete please.

delete.

here I am, <--- These lines should start with capitals

falling, fainting, from the sane <--- This doesn't connect to the sentence below it so it should end with a period

swirling worlds and echoes <--- this and the line below it seem random, like they were thrown in to fill up space, though relative they are. Maybe try to connect them? Make it flow!

my life breathes all the same <-- same and sane sound much too similar. That and the fact that there is no rhyme scheme make it seem ill-placed

Lost in limbo, <--- period here. Awesome one-liner though!

music deep and moving,

inside my mind, <--- Another period here

seas of riot rising, <-- Clever alliteration!

all behind these eyes.

Overall:

I really liked the topic of this poem! I'm unsure if you were using creative license when it came to the lack of punctuation. Other than that, short and to the point. I thought it was really cute!

By the way, blue writing is for my personal opinions. Red is for punctuation errors. Any other colour usually means I liked it!

~The.Dreamwalker

Hey, I liked this poem. The reviewer before me did a pree good job on summming up the corrections so yeah, I really like it

Keep pursuing poeming, even while listening to music. Heehee, thumbs up!

Good job, you have a good rhythm here, just a few mistakes already pointed out. Very deep words, but ti's kind of hard to understand. I'm not much of a poet, so I'm not very in depth, but I'm pretty sure that the main theme was about being confused in your head. Anyways, It sounded very good.

Thanks guys And The.Dreamwalker, yeah, I can't really be bothered using proper punctuation/grammar with any poems I come up with xP But thank you