I like your use of alliteration! Nicely sexual pop-can! This is a dirty little poem, isn't it. I like it. So simple, so understated. Although the use of the word "Fraudulent" is a little forced. "Slovenly" too. Try better words. "Sluttish" works a little better. Good job! Remember, a poem is never finished, only abandoned.
Those who dance are thought insane by those who don't hear the music. Those who fit well into their world don't generally go about changing it.
Remember: the plot is nothing more than footprints left in the snow after your characters have run by on their way to incredible destinations. — Ray Bradbury
