Young Writers Society

it's falling,
gently drifting
down.
they call it pure
and beauty.

what harm
can come from
seeing elegance?
gliding down,
silently, but unceasingly,
self-advertisting
everywhere,
in the streets,
the homes
of people, nowhere to go,
trying to sleep.

no disturbance,
for them, primarily,
of their dreams,
until they don't stop
dreaming in their slumber.

and we can see their beauty
everywhere.
but others have to pay
for us,
all so we can see
pure.

emotion_less, that's really pretty!

The only thing that I kind of dislike is the spacing of the poem. To me, it seems almost too spaced-out now. This is the way I suggest:

it's falling, gently drifting down.
they call it pure and beauty.

what harm can come from seeing elegance?
gliding down, silently, but unceasingly,
self-advertisting everywhere,
in the streets, the homes of people
nowhere to go, trying to sleep.

no disturbance for them,
primarily, of their dreams,
until they don't stop
dreaming in their slumber.

and we can see their beauty everywhere.
but others have to pay for us,
all so we can see pure.

I really like the meaning behind this though, to me it seems alot deeper than it looks.

Also, in some of the parts, I think you should use different forms of the words, like in the second line, having pure and beautiful instead of pure and beauty.

And the last comment by the Dreamo kid is that I really suggest making it look "clean" and orderly, by capitalizing all the first words of lines.

-Dreami

Thats really sweet! I like it!