Need help with my short story

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Hi, I've written a short story and I need some critique, the following link will lead to a page in which you can lead comments on my piece of work. I need to bring the word count from 1021 to 1000 for a short story competition I want to enter.
https://docs.google.com/a/csg.school/do ... sp=sharing
I am a new writer and I'd really like some help thank you so much!



I was weeping as much for him as her; we do sometimes pity creatures that have none of the feeling either for themselves or others.
— Emily Bronte, Wuthering Heights