Young Writers Society

This was very good! I enjoyed reading it. It flowed nicely and your rhythm was wonderful!

Keep up the good work and keep writing! You are are very good!


Dawning light, setting sun-
Saints and warriors, one by one
Fade into the past
Leaving shadows cold as stone.

We are only two-
Working miracles, me and you.
Soldiers of the truth
In this life we%u2019re never alone Loved this stanza


Step into today,
All impurities burn away.
This one was my favorite but...the other ones have four maybe this one should too? Its up to you just thought it might look better

~KJR~

Thanks. It's an incomplete verse; I was hoping to get help with it.

Okay, first of all. I'm already singing this. It's very haunting for me, it feels as though a group of men are marching towards their death, all singing this haunting melody. Now, I will describe the image that comes to me when I sing (*cough*) I mean, read this piece.

Dawning light, setting sun-

Represents that time is present, however not stating how much time is passing. This leaves it up to the reader to interpret it as they see fit. I see it as a general description of time, as in, a very long lapse in time.

Saints and warriors, one by one
Fade into the past
Leaving shadows cold as stone.

Everyone dies, no matter what road they choose to encompass. Saints and warriors have very different morals or goals and yet, each one becomes one with the earth, becoming part of the past.

We are only two-
Working miracles, me and you.

Becomes first person point of view, allowing the readers to realize that this is realistic and takes place on a personal level. To me, this says that just by living and being here, people are a miracle because they are a living being. However, being only two, not in a literal sense, is that there can only be so much done. I believe this is making reference to the first stanza about being forgotten, becoming part of the past no matter how hard one may try.

Soldiers of the truth
In this life we’re never alone

However, human's must learn to accept that they are never alone because everyone dies and is eventually forgotten to some extent. It is a hard truth but a truth at that.

Step into today,
All impurities burn away.

Realize and live for today, forget about the past or the future.

Now, I know this is absolutely not what you meant when you wrote this but my mind always interprets things much differently. Beautiful piece anyways.

Much love,
Saye

Amazing!I think it's perfect.Keep up the good work, I mean it!