This was a pretty cool story plot-wise, but you could've made it so much longer! Give us descriptions, emotions, etc. All-in-all, what I'm trying to say is that we need more! Drag it out without making it tedious, and you could have a really cool story. Keep writing, StoryWeaver
Reading is one form of escape. Running for your life is another. ~Lemony Snicket
I have to agree with storyweaver; this story has a lot of potential, but you kept each paragraph only about a sentence long. Try setting the scene beforehand, was she talking with her friends, or was she just silent. Why was she silent? What was her teacher doing? What were they supposed to be making in art class? How do the students react to the alarm going off? What's going through her mind as she's in the dark room? Give us more of a feel of who the main character is, and describe her mysterious kisser in a bit more detail. I know that it's difficult due to the fact that it's pitch black in there, but give us some hints to what he could be like, did he press his body up against hers? Was he toned or heavier?
Add onto the story and I can really see you having something quite interesting.
-Once
It is better to travel well than to arrive. -Buddha
This was just an idea I got in class the other day, I've got a ton of ideas on what and who the characters are. But you guys really think I should go more in depth with the opening?
