The Last Hero: Short Prologue: Dark Days are Looming

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The day was darker on the snowy planet, Obsnence. This was of no surprise to the people of Argon for this day was when the moon orbiting the planet eclipsed the sun, just as it did every year. The inhabitants of this city were inside their log homes, for Kato, the careless gatekeeper of the city walls, will sometimes fall asleep at his post and let in creatures such as wolves, who, on this planet, hunt at night.
Inside the quiet city walls, a different hunter of the night lurked through the many ice covered streets and forgotten alleys of the city, being careful not to be stepping in front of the windows of the buildings that surround him. The man is 6 feet tall and wears a darkly colored cape that he carefully wrapped around his body. He also wears knee-high boots and a black scarf with many tears in it that covers all of his face except for his nose and eyes for he needs those senses open for the task he was going to pull off.
He walked into yet another alley but instead of continuing on, he stopped and observed the brick walls of the building to his right. He reached into his pocket and brought out a thin, coiled up, piece of wire. He said to the wire,
"Listen to the job I have for you and listen well, the next place I write on brick, you will bring me to through heaven or hell." And with that the wire slowly uncurled itself in his hand as he approached the brick wall. Using the wire as a writing utensil, he scratched the words, 'The Twelfth Palace' on the Brick.
After he wrote those words the wire seemed to enlarge into something that resembled a man sized, black, snake. The snake wrapped up around the Dark Magician until he was not seen. The snake uncoiled itself from the man to reveal the man was not there anymore.
Last edited by AsSunshineIsToHippies on Sat Jan 05, 2008 11:52 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Once upon a time, I posted a magical message. Then everyone danced and sang keeping the beat with their hands. The End. :)




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Gender Female
Points 890
Reviews 85
Hmmm. The beginning part of this piece was like something I would read on the back of a book. The rest was so so. I think you could do more to add meat to this piece. It was good plot wise and very interesting, but I didn't get much out of it. Also, you should try making it longer.

I really like your planet name, thought. It sounds so....Serene.

Good job,
~N~
It's the very witching time of night.



Kindness is the language the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
— Mark Twain