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Chapter 1- A Lovely Nightmare
Daniel swept in from behind and wrapped his arms around my waist. I jumped, but he seemed highly amused and laughed as I turned around ready to beat the crap out of him.
"Always sneaking up on me," I said between giggles and swings to his face. He grabbed my swinging arms by the wrists and pulled me closer until our noses touched and my vision was filled in a sea of green. The gold flecks there seemed to dance as they saw me and looked into my own eyes. Daniel was always in a happy mood, even if the times were tough.
"Ah, a little feisty there, aren't we?" And just like that we were kissing, all my edginess slowly diminishing... but not totally. I couldn't forget why I was here.
I broke away to catch my breath and speak. "He should have been here by now." I looked around to the closed little door in the corner the room. It was closed, and seemed to stare me in the face and say ‘Try me, Stella. Behind me is a nightmare you’re just waiting to see.’
"Hush, Stel. Everything is going to be fine. Just trust me on this one," he whispered close by my ear. It tickled as his breath came onto it, like a gentle wind that sweeps by. Daniel was known for giving a simple, sweet gesture just when I needed it.
I pulled away and looked around the waiting room in the hospital. I remembered why we were here and all the grim circumstances that held me in place.
We stood on carpet colored a puke shade and the walls stood a brilliant yellow. Windows were stationed everywhere, and when the late noon sun spilled in it created a more cheerful atmosphere. It was an illusion, though. A trick of the mind. The sunlight was but only temporary, and the sun would soon disappear into the horizon. The happy glow in the room was from the paint, and made it seem something it's not.
"Stella, can you please stop worrying so much? I'm sure it's fine and the doctor is coming in a few minutes. Relax."
But I couldn't. I was facing probably the most frightening realization that I might be sick, and I mean really sick. In a few moments, I would face a doctor and be told whether that was true or not. And the truth was that I didn’t want to know, because either way I’d tremble. Either way I’d be hurting.
A nurse told me I could go through the small door I'd had my eyes glued to for the past half hour. It had seemed like forever until I could go see the doctor, and now I was simply terrified to walk over. The door had chipped paint and a brass doorknob that seemed to make my hands even sweatier as I grasped it. I wiped my hands on my jeans and took the steps through it and into the hallway.
Daniel followed close behind, ready to give anything. He once said he’d give me the world if I asked. I remember asking him how he’d plan on doing so, and though we were just playing around, he looked seriously into my eyes and said some thing I’ll never forget.
“If you ever need something, I promise I’ll get it to you. You just name it. As long as you’re my angel on earth, I will always find a way for you.”
I was lucky to have him by my side now, and his presence was all I could ask for. I tried to focus on him instead of how long the hallway seemed to be, and how close the doctor's office really was. That made me the perspiration come even more, until I could feel it beading my forehead and making my breath come faster and harder. I didn’t notice I was panting and dizzy until someone came up behind Daniel and I, making me come back to my harsh reality.
"Stella, Dr. Johnsden will see you now," a nurse told me once again. I hadn't noticed I'd stopped walking as I got nearer to the office. It was so close that I could feel the cool air coming from it and see the door left ajar, just waiting for me.
I thought of my mother as I took those few last steps. She couldn't be here today, even though she wanted to, because she had a nursing shift. Ha! Even when we were in the same building together she still couldn't come with her own daughter to go to the doctor's office. I was sad, yet happy Daniel was here. If there was anyone in the world I'd want by my side at this moment, it would be him. He grabbed my hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze as we entered the tiny little doctor's office.
The doctor sitting behind the desk, Dr. Johnsden, motioned towards two chairs stationed on a little silk rug in front of his huge desk. It seemed to take up half the space in the room. Daniel led me over to a chair and then took his seat. He was still holding tight to my hand the whole way through, and I was grateful. If he hadn't been, I may have just collapsed then and there. I felt so weak, so powerless. The doctor was about to say what I hadn't wanted to hear in such a long, long time.
"I have your test results, Stella, and I'm afraid I have some bad news." The doctor seemed to give his sympathy in those words, but it never came across. All I heard echoing in my head was bad news, bad news. I tried to brace myself, but nothing could prepare me for what I was about to hear.
"Stella, dear, you're relapsing. Your cancer is back." The only thing I'd been feeling was Daniel's clammy hand, and even that slipped from my grip. Everything fell away from me, the plush chairs, the huge desk, the doctor, Daniel, and was replaced by my swarming mind. Denial flashed before my eyes, but one thought stood out the most.
This can't be happening to me again.
Gives an easy understanding to the relationship between the couple.
It wan an illusion, though; a trick of the mind. 
