Relate

Spoiler

I wrote this because I was feeling like friends don't really "cut it" in life. Don't get me wrong- I have a few really close friends! But, you know what- no matter how close you are to a friend, they're never going to truly relate. So instead of making friendship a priority, just try to have fun and improve other people's lives; more friends will come out of it.

You never were a part-
A piece of the Whole,
Fragmented is your heart,
Single is your soul

For friends change on a whim,
On dire, minced desire,
A fire, not a hymn-
A second-guessed mire

Interaction is but a fraction,
When oceans are between us,
Petty friends have no relation,
To our wounds, they are callous

So learn to understand,
The shy and the loud,
Because Society’s demand
Is that you drown in the Cloud

This is crazy beautifully written! I love how you pieced your words together and the emotion was beautiful! You stanza structure was very ideal and your organization of events was spot on! My only suggestion is two maybe better punctuate your second stanza! Only cause it is so beautifully written I do not want people to become confused! They would be really missing out!

So learn to understand,
The shy and the loud,
Because Society’s demand
Is that you drown in the Cloud

Great ending! I love how you bring society in this, the harshness of this poem makes me wanna throw something! Which such a great emotion to draw from this incredible poem! Keep up the great work! You are a fabulous writer!

THIS IS great right here

Interaction is but a fraction,
When oceans are between us,
Petty friends have no relation,
To our wounds, they are callous

you've got an amazing poem! the way it's written,how you can see and feel some emotion.the last stanza had a great ending and it seemed to speak out.only thing is i got to go with the person above. maybe a little punctuation may help out:) but overall nice job!

Geeh, you're very VERY talanted! Your style and the words you use and how you use them... it's all just amazing! This poem is just beautiful, truly one of the best things I've ever read! No complaints at all! I LOVED IT SO MUCH!

This first stanza was espacially good;

"You never were a part-
A piece of the Whole,
Fragmented is your heart,
Single is your soul"

You'll be the first to get 7/5 icky, sticky spiders!

Good Luck & Keep Writing

// Demoness