This is a minuscule poem.I think that it is pretty good for your first poem. I think maybe you could add some more imagery in the form of similes, metaphors or symbolism. When I was reading this I thought, what does she wish to convey by writing this?I think you have a great start and I would like to read more of your writing. Fiction
It sounds like you're going though a tough time. Comments: Death can be really depressing. People die everyday like you said, even people like unborn babies. Did you know 3500 babies get aborted in the US everyday? Like every thirty seconds, a babie is aborted... Critique: Maybe you could descibe more? It would be really cool if you added onto this poem. Welcome to YWS by the way. *Clicks Like*. -Crescent
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