This Little Poem

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This is an entry to: contests/viewcontest.php?id=19 My word is: writing.


I once had a friend who wrote short sentences that never came together.
Yet in the end she smiled and said, That’s the way I like it.
Just as I like warm weather and quick wit, I like my short sentences.


Her imagery was wonderful, full of charm and attractive sentiments.
But when it came to finishing she said, Thus finished it is.
It doesn’t need an ending when it’s charming the way it is.
"Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them, they die."




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I like it, but maybe you shouldn't end two sentences at the end with it is.
When I was young, I admired clever people. Now that I am old, I admire kind people.
-Abraham Joshua Heschel




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Howdy there!

I've read the poem several times over, and I have to say, it's one interesting poem you've got there. Although it is really short, it is neat and well kept. What I mean is it doesn't need to be longer. It's merely stating a point through the use of poetry and I really liked that.

I love the layout and presentation, the use of italics makes it so much more easier to read, and makes it stand out the page, attracting the readers attention which is always important.

Although I do have to agree with tgirly you shouldn't end the last two lines with the same few words, it stops the flow and it sounds forced.

Other than that really well done!
~TheGillianGill~

There's a bright light, see it in the distance? It's called your future.




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This is really good. I like it.
! Time to Write !




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I once had a friend who wrote short sentences that never came together. Yet in the end she smiled and said, That’s the way I like it.


^ I can't even explain how much I love this is a "Little Poem" and the friend liked short sentences -- wait, does that makes sense? (hopefully it does to you) Anyway, I just love this poem and I can't wait to read more of your work! :)

Keep it up!
~JustMeNathalie
I don't obsess.

I think.

Intensely.

-----

Excuse me, I have work to do. Evil plots don't make themselves.



"It is not in the stars to hold our destiny but in ourselves."
— William Shakespeare