Hi Chazzer! I can find only two little mistakes. (I love the icon, by the way.)
chazzer wrote:I’m a child in the corner and I’m scared. I am scared. You’re the lost cause that I love and I’m aware. I’m aware:
In the first "I'm scared," you use a contraction. In the repetition of this phrase, you don't. So, following this patter, why don't you change the second "I'm aware" to "I am aware"?
chazzer wrote:Question questions yourself
"Yourself" should be "you."
Overall, I love the topic of this poem. John F. Kennedy for the win! I don't think your rhymes are too simplistic at all! Remember, though, a song doesn't have to rhyme to be wonderful! A great example of a non-rhyming song is "Across the Universe," by the Beatles. Anyway, good job!
When your heart gets pierced with arrows, don't rip them out and pierce those around you in retribution for your hurt. You'll only unnecessarily wound others and bleed to death yourself. — LadyMysterio
