I've always had a strange fascination with WWII, and this really was very good. I most definitely felt like I was in 1941
I loved how they meet, both being American, in England. It's a very good idea. I'm also very intrigued to find out why they're both so familiar to each other. I'm, like, sitting on the edge of my seat. You were wondering if this was too fast paced? It wasn't at all! Perfect, if you ask me. You've woven a very interesting plot already. I can't wait to read what comes next. Your characters are very different, and have constant personalities. I've noticed that some people sort of forget who their characters are, but yours are defined and have their separate traits. This is a very good first chapter.
The only thing I was wondering was what rough age Rissa and Robbie were? (Nice names by the way)
Yeah, so, I have a massive geek crush on Robbie already. Be proud.
Have a great day and PLEASE write some more. This was extraordinary.
~*~ Chelsea ~*~
We're young, open flowers in the windy fields of this war-torn world - Mumford & Sons
The Good I like! This was very well written and there were no grammar mistakes as far as I can tell. The characters were interesting enough to keep me reading and it was very authentic. Well done!
To improve... I think the first bit was excellent, but it started to lose it a little when Rissa and Robbie started talking. I thought that it was strange how they just started arguing like that when they have just met - I felt like Rissa wouldn't have reacted so strongly, but hey, you created her. Also I think it would have been better if they hadn't talked so much on a first meeting, maybe have the talking when, inevitably, they meet again. Try to keep Robbie's mystery there so the reader is more interested in him. I also thought it was weird that he kept asking her questions - he has after all, just met her. It was a very long scene which would have benefited from splitting up a bit...somehow. All just my opinions though.
Overall, this was good and I would definately read more! Maddy~
Oooh, very interesting. I cannot wait for another chapter. Nicely done. But I don't really know the age of Riss or Robbie. That being said, are they young or old?
If I can impact one person, just one, with my writing before I die, then I've lived a great life
Hey! That's really good! You've kept me interested and im desperate to know how he is familiar to her. I especially love the fact that they clashed at the beginning, that is always how good romantic novels start and yours seems very able to be one of those! Try to keep the same writing style becuase i think it is good for your book. One thing i would say is that when you say she is going to 'people watch' i was wondering if you could phrase that another way, into a sentence prehaps. I'm sorry its just i don't think it sounds as good.
but overall its really impressive. i would read on for sure!
x
When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life you have a thousand reasons to smile. For instance, you still have chocolate x
This was very well written and there were no grammar mistakes as far as I can tell. The characters were interesting enough to keep me reading and it was very authentic. Well done!
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