Here's chapter 2, better in my opinion than chapter 1, but obviously not without fault. Tear it apart and throw the remains in my face. Do whatever you like, as long as it's constructive.
A dusty beam of sunlight landed on Arthur's face, rousing him from his sleep. He yawned as he sat up, noticing that the rain had stopped. It was so quiet he could hear his family and neighbour snoring nearby. He sat for a moment, taking in the sights. He looked up at the loft, and decided to go and keep his father company.
As he walked across the barn he heard birds chirping in the trees outside, and a slight breeze blowing in through the broken windows. The ladder made its usual creaking noise as he ascended it. He disembarked into the loft, but his father wasn't there.
On the ground was a note.
Arthur crawled through the hay and picked it up. Upon it was a message, scrawled in black ink. It read: “You have four hours to turn yourselves in.”
Arthur felt a weight in his heart. He clawed his way to the ladder, and scrambled down it. 'Black, wake up.'
'What is it,' said Black, pushing himself up on the heels of his hands.
Arthur shoved the piece of paper in front of Black's face. Black grabbed it, squinting to read the messy lettering.
'Fuck,' he said, jumping to his feet, 'wake your mother and sister.'
'What will we do?' said Arthur as he dashed over to the women.
'Don't panic,' said Black, 'I'll think of something.'
'I don't want to turn myself in.'
'You don't have to, we'll get him back.'
Arthur shook Sibo by the shoulder. 'What,' she muttered, still half asleep, a strand of her brown hair falling into her mouth as she spoke.
Don’t panic,' said Black, holding his arms out as one does to stop a jumping dog, ‘your father has been kidnapped.’
'Kidnapped,' blurted Sibo.
'We'll get him back, don't you worry. We'll just have to get into the fort and sneak him out. Nothing I haven't done before,' said Black, picking up his crossbow and axe. 'You shielas stay here, Arthur, you're with me.'
'No way,' said Sibo. 'He’s my father too, and I’m older than Arthur. I'm coming too.'
'This is man's work,' said Black, looking Sibo in the eye.
'You're not taking my son unless I come with you,' said Sue firmly, crossing her arms.
'Fine,' sighed Black. 'Have it your way. I hope you girls know how to fight.'
'Well we've had no less experience than Arthur,' said Sibo.
Black hesitated. 'Take these then,' he said, reluctantly handing them each a sword. 'These are for you Arthur,' he said, handing him a sword and a crossbow.
'None of us have actually used these before,' said Arthur.
'You won't need to,' said Black. 'If all goes to plan the only one doing any fighting will be me. They're for just in case.'
Black tucked his axe into his belt and pushed the door open. Bright sunlight hit them, and Arthur squinted as his eyes adjusted. Black led them outside into the crisp morning air. Last nights storm clouds had fled the sky, leaving only a bright blue expanse. The only disturbance in the air was a slight breeze.
Black veered onto a road in major disrepair. 'There shouldn't be any guards this way,' he said.
They walked uphill along the potholed trail. It ran alongside the palisade, and on the other side were tightly crammed wood and tin buildings. The road was in such bad condition that some of the bricks had even come out, and now sat atop the road eroding away. This was the part of town where people even poorer than Arthur’s family lived.
They rounded a bend and the fort came into view. Its walls were of the same sharpened logs as the palisade, only taller. A sentry paced up and down along the battlements.
They moved at a walking pace towards the fort. Once they were out of the sentry's line of sight, Black led them behind a patch of shrubbery next to the side wall. He unbuttoned his jacket and withdrew a weathered rope, which looked like it could snap at any moment. He made it into a lasso, threw it over one of the stakes at the top of the wall and pulled it tight, so that the fraying became even more pronounced.
'Wait here,' he whispered, as he began to climb. His arm muscles bulged as he pulled himself up the wall, using his feet to keep himself horizontal. Slowly he lifted his head over the top, holding his crossbow in one hand. The oblivious sentry walked along the wall in the other direction.
Black lifted one leg over and pulled himself between two of the sharpened logs. He immediately crouched with his crossbow pointed at the sentry, ready to fire had he been heard. The sentry made no reactionHe shuffled across the battlement and looked over the wall into the courtyard. There was a wooden stage with a hangman's noose set up in the courtyard, with two guards standing either side. Another two soldiers in plate armour stood on either side of the admin building door, holding deadly looking halberds across the entrance.
Black pulled a knife out of his belt and edged towards the sentry, crouching down so the guards in the courtyard couldn’t see him. In his other hand was his crossbow, pointing at the man's head. He slowly closed the gap between him and his victim, creeping as silently as a cat.
As if sensing Black's presence, the sentry spun around. Black leapt forward and plunged the blade into the sentry's throat, but not before he got off a aloud cry for help.
'Bugger,' said Black under his breath, pulling the knife out and pushing the corpse over.
Hearing the commotion, Arthur pulled himself up the rope as fast as he could, finding it much more effort than expected. He lifted his head up and saw Black fire his crossbow over the other side of the wall.Arthur hoisted himself onto the wall. As soon as he was up he saw a guard running towards him with a halberd. He threw himself at the ground as the weapon’s head flew over him, lodging in the wall. The guard yanked at it, trying to dislodge the heavy pole.
Black threw his knife at Arthur's aggressor. It whirled through the air and stabbed into his face.
'Aarghhh,' screamed the man, falling to his knees. A copious river of blood leaked between his fingers as he clutched at his face.
Arthur stared in horror, frozen in place.
'Kill the bastard,' shouted Black.
Arthur couldn't move, feeling a wave of nausea build up as he watched the soldier scream in agony and grasp at the knife.
'What are you waiting for Arthur, kill him.'
Arthur still couldn't move. The soldier bent over. Blood pooled on the battlement beneath his head, And his screams drowned out all else.
‘Do it Arthur,’ shouted Black. ‘You’re only prolonging his pain.'
Arthur looked at the ground in front of him, unable to bring himself to kill another human being.
’Bloody useless,' said Black as he rushed forward and hacked off the bleeding soldier's head. 'You can't lock up in the middle of battle.' Black shook Arthur by the shoulder.
Sue climbed onto the battlement. 'Oh god,' she said, averting her eyes when she saw the mutilated face lying on the ground, detached from its owner’s body.
'Give me that,' said Black, yanking Arthur's crossbow from him. He aimed it at one of the guards running towards them. The bolt punched through the plate armour. Blood trickled out of the hole. The soldier fell thrashing to the ground, his armour scraping loudly against the battlement.
Arthur put his hands over his eyes. He heard the sound of metal clanging and another man screaming. The smell of blood wafted into his nose.
'Help,' came a high pitched squeel behind him. Arthur turned around and saw Sibo clinging to the rope, as a soldier on the ground below pulled at her leg. Arthur leaned over the wall and grabbed her hand. In his other hand he held his sword, stretching down and trying to fend off the soldier.He felt a sudden tug, and he dropped his sword, grasping Sibo’s arm with both hands.
'Help,' She screamed again.
Sue ran up beside them with the fallen sentry's spear. She jabbed it at the man's arm and he let go. He shied away, calling to another soldier running towards the gate. The soldier stopped and drew an arrow from his quiver.
Sue took Sibo’s other arm, and together she and Rthur gave an almighty pull, and Sibo slid onto the wall just before the arrow whizzed overhead. All three of them tumbled over onto the battlement. Arthur saw Black slaying another guard further down the wall.
Sibo screamed. Arthur looked over the wall where her gaze was fixed. A soldier with a sword held between his teeth climbed up the rope. He grabbed his sword in one hand, and tried to stab Sibo, but Arthur pulled her back just in time.
Sue slashed the rope and the guard fell down, collapsing in a heap as he crashed into the ground.
'Come on,' called Black from the courtyard, 'he might still be alive.'
Arthur ran down the steps, trailed closely by Sue and Sibohan. They dashed across the cobbled courtyard, following Black through the set of double doors.
Arthur froze at what he saw.
Standing halfway up a flight of stairs, the governor held a sword to his handcuffed father's neck.
'Please don't,' said Sue.
The governor slit John's throat.
Arthur fell to his knees, his eyes filling with tears as he saw his father's body slump onto the stone staircase. He leaned against his mother and put his hands over his eyes.
'Kill them,' said the governor's cold voice.
'You bastard,' screamed Black as he charged forward, shouldering one of the soldiers standing in front of the governor as he passed. He continued running, smashing his axe head into another soldier's stomach. He left it lodged there, and drew his sword, slicing off one of the governor's arms in a single motion. He brought the blade down on the other side, severing the other arm.
The governor's face changed from an expression of power to pain. Black stared him relentlessly in the eye and thrust the sword through his gut, nailing him to the wall.
'No,' whimpered the governor. 'Please, have mercy. No.'
Black slammed his fist into the governor's jaw, knocking it out of place with a loud crack. The governor screamed.
'How do you like that huh,' said Black, kicking the governor in the groin as hard as he could. 'How does that feel.'
The governor's eyes were shut tight, his face contorted in agony.
Black punched the helpless man in the nose, and blood leaked down his face. Then he took out his knife and flayed off a sheet of skin from the governor's face, before stabbing it into his kneecap.
The screams were so loud that Arthur had to block his ears. He looked away feeling very sick.
Black withdrew the sword from the man's gut and stabbed it through his neck, putting an end to his screams. He turned around to see the others kneeling in tears by the open door. He hurried to them.
Arthur edged away, not wanting to go too close to the monster.
'I'm so sorry,' said Black. 'I've failed.'
A tear ran down Black's face.
Arthur felt his mother put an arm around his shoulder. His tears soaked into her sleeve. They stayed like that for a long moment, unable to do anything else. The sound of footsteps outside alerted them.
Arthur opened his eyes. His vision was blurry, but he could make out the presence of a soldier running into the building.
Black grabbed Sibo's sword from her belt and ran the soldier through, almost being stabbed himself. As he withdrew the sword, he saw a large group of guards running towards them. He backed up.
'Get upstairs,' he said, helping pull Sibo up.
Arthur ran to the stairs and turned to see Black fighting the first soldier in. He looked down at his father's body. It lay intact, except for the clean cut across the throat. He grasped the cooling hands and pulled.
'Help me pull him,' said Arthur. Sue took one of the arms and they heaved John’s body onto the balcony, laying him down on the floor.
Arthur stared into his father's closed eyes, and grief turned into anger. Looking up, he saw a decorative bow and arrows hanging on the wall. He took it down and ran to the edge of the balcony. Five soldiers waited on the bottom floor, while one fought Black on the staircase.
Arthur ducked as one of the guards fired a crossbow at him. The bolt flew over his head and snapped when it hit the stone wall behind him. He drew back an arrow and leaned over the railing. He aimed it at the guard with the crossbow and shot him in the heart. It made a loud thump as it hit its mark, and the body collapsed without a struggle.
Black backed up the stairs. One of the soldiers clambered up over the mangled body of his comrade. Black feigned a swipe at the man's head. The guard raised his shield to block, and Black stabbed him in the guts. As he fell to his knees, Black decapitated him, and blood shot out the top of his neck like steam from a geyser.
The remaining soldiers took one look at Black with his dripping red sword, and bolted. Arthur took one of them down with an arrow in the calf. The soldier rolled and tried to get back up, but as he was lifting himself, Black's boot slammed him back into the floor again. Black ran out the door and hurled his axe at the other soldier. Without bothering to see if it hit, he ran back inside and pointed his sword at the injured man's throat.
'Don't kill me,' whimpered the man, holding his arms in front of his face 'I can help you.'
'I should hope so,' said Black, motioning for the soldier to stand up. He did so, wincing as he put weight on his wounded leg. 'Come with me.'
Black took the man upstairs at sword point. 'First of all you're gunna lock the gate.' Black shoved him out onto the wall. 'Hurry up.'
The soldier hobbled along the battlement to the wooden gatehouse. A company of soldiers ran up the street towards the fort.
'And if you don't close it before they get in you're dead.'
The soldier took the rusty metal crank in his hands and began turning it.The gates slowly swung inwards, grating on the inside of the gatehouse.
The doors slammed shut moments before the soldiers made it in. Black grabbed the hostage in a headlock and stood at the front of the battlement. An archer aiming an arrow lowered his bow when he saw the hostage. In the street below guards stood looking up in bewilderment. There was a face in every window, watching the as the revolution begun.
'People,' said Black in a loud, clear voice. 'These pigs have oppressed you too long. Too long have you lived in fear. Today we end that. Tear them apart.' He threw the soldier off the wall. The body hit the road hard, making a loud bone crunching crackle.
A cheer went up among the masses. People jumped over fences and charged from their homes wielding nothing but their fists. The horde of angry civilians swamped the soldiers, like soldier ants on a grasshopper.
Arthur ran onto the wall and saw the great riot unfold. Mobs of unarmed civilians flung themselves onto soldiers, pummelling them to death; swamping them with sheer numbers. A soldier on horseback charged through the crowd, fending off the horde with his curved blade. Someone grabbed him by the leg and pulled him from the saddle. A heavy boot met his face moments after he had struck the ground. The people massacred him, tearing off his armour to get at the vulnerable body within.
'Arthur,' called Black, standing gaunt upon the battlement, wind blowing at the wisps of blonde hair that had freed themselves from his ponytail. 'Your father won't have died in vain.'
The only thing is that dialogue should always be surrounded by double quotations "like so."
Sorry that I'm so easily confused, but is the sentry on the other side of the fence? If not, how would he not notice the rope from the lasso?