~nariel~

Vernon: Now that I go back and read it, I do see that it's a little cliche. I'll try and make the wings more descriptive and original. To everyone else: ...

chocoholic: Thanks for your comments. This is a brand new piece. I decided to take a break on the other one. :) I'll try and add more descriptions in chapter ...

Hey, here's another angelic fiction of mine. It's kind of based off of Tainted (one of my other stories) but it has a different storyline. I know this is short, ...

Yay! You wrote chapter 5! There isn't really much to say about it. The grammar and spelling was good and yes, it was kind of short. Some sentences were worded ...

Ohhhh, this was so goooood. The title is what got me becuase I used to have a crush on this guy named Tom. :oops: Anyways, the other reviewers caught your ...

I thought this started off really good! I have an idea for your student # 242. When I read it, it kind of reminded me of concentration camps where the ...

*Shivers* This was very good! The other reviewers caught you mistakes so I'm just going to tell you how good this is!!! I also just LOVED your opening sentence. It ...

Very interesting. I just have a few comments. I was real surprised when the guy says that he's going to kill Andrea. It was just like: huh? What just happened? ...

Hello! Yes, I think Selene is a very cute name too. Seated within that very armchair was a dark man, even darker than the room. His hair was dark, his ...

Hello, welcome to YWS! First, before you post any of your work, you are required to critique at least two stories. It's in the rules. Second, this is way too ...

It's your title that got me to read this in the first place. Very cool title. ”I have found you angel child”, said the man. This sentence really bugged me. ...

Hey! I liked the tone of mysteriousness in this. It kept me reading. There's a few things that bugged me though. It is dark. I really don't like this simple ...

Yay! Chapter 4 is up! Okay first thing. Your vampires are just way too much like Stephanie Meyer's. Maybe you could keep the cold skin and change some other things ...

Okay, I edited this up, taking in account what you guys said. I will start writing chapter one right away and thanks for the reviews. This will probably be the ...

Uh oh. It's working on my computer. I think you just click on it and it shows the spoilers. It was just basically talking about what happens in later chapters. ...