xxbwiismexx

A life lost in limbo, drowns in the past Dreams become nightmares, no hope in our flesh, When truths become lies and changes hold fast Our machine crashes and our ...

I think the rhymes are beautiful and it gives such a powerful message. Though I feel that the flow was choppy and a bit random at some lines. Also, the ...

Here lies the tale, Of a girl long ago, Rest in pieces young lady, Its payment you owe. Young girl of nineteen, Only daughter of three, Met the boy of ...

But part of me id beyond caring Id shouldbe is, thats all I could see for you to fix. It's definately a good start and you should keep going with ...

It's really good, you should keep going. You use a great amount of detail and I don't really have anything to nitpick at. Good work!!! PM me if you add ...

That Was REALLY good You've most definately got me interested PM me whenever you post more. ~Bri

So with the posting, once you post things people'll just read them and post a review right?

For the rest of the night she complained until five a.m. That could be switched around a little bit but other than that I really like it! PM me when ...

You can feel the characters sadness through the words, but you can also feel her joy in her memories. Theres a sense in your words of something ending, as well ...

The air is thick with temptation she feels it flowing through her veins sharp and pure. Her stomach twists, her lips forming a thin line where they meet. Teeth clenched, ...

I really like this, you most definately should post more. You could easily take the small fragments you have and edit them in to some form of a story. I ...

I personally really like it! It's really mysterious so far, which is always good in a piece of writing. You've definately got me interested! I also love your character's name ...

Hey People reading this! I'm Bri! Just wondering how to get started here. I'm new so someone to talk to'd be AmAzInG!!!!

Dear diary, 09/24/10 This is the first time I’ve written something like this, nobody writes diaries anymore. But they keep telling me it’ll help in the long run. They want ...