xavia-finch

The angel smiled. They always smiled, and Crawford hated them for it. He especially hated this one. ‘You mustn’t let your sorrow drown you,’ it said. ‘There is forever hope.’ ...

Your grammer is good. That's one thing. But I don't like the skunk idea and it took me a while to get past your rambling. Perhaps cut that back next ...

Chapter Two The Witch Hunter’s Town My suggestions are in bold - Xavia-finch The midnight air was cool and crisp as the Canaby sisters flew high above the clouds. They ...

I'm not judging you, but if you want people to comment on your writing and not the subject matter you could just pretend its fictional. Everything we write, fiction or ...

I only read the first few paragraphs because im rushed for time and Ill do a better critique later. But I saw what i needed to see. Your back into ...

I totally agree with the other critiquer. can't remember who it was sorry. This is NOT fantasy. THIS IS TRIVIAL GIRLY 12 YEAR OLD TEEN FICTION. Im so disappointed because ...

Chapter Two Barkley was lying on Nicole's bed, sleeping. >> more description here perhaps? snoring quietly...etc Nicole laughed as she watched his legs twitch, like he was chasing something >> ...

Prologue Chapter One- The Storybook Nicole had never seen this bookstore before. She slowed her bike and turned down the volume on her walkman. The little shop was tucked into ...

She breathed in the scent of the fresh morning air, savoring the crisp feeling of it in her throat, on her eye lids and playfully caressing her cheeks. She longed ...

Disclaimer: He tried his best to look at as many features of the woman as possible. She had blonde hair. The same colour as Tendra, his lover. The same length ...

Helloooooooooooooooo >>My suggestions are in bold ********************************************************************************* Loira's hands trembled as she read and reread the summons over and o

I have no time for constructive criticism, i just wanted to say i think this story is really good. Very interesting. If theres more ill read it.

My name is Delihla Bee. I try to pretend my family is at least semi-normal and some of the time it works! But other times... well it's a living- hell, ...

A wolf’s howl broke the silence over Mourner’s Peak. Jake shivered and pulled his cloak tighter around him. Flickering embers made shadows of his features. Seeing the youth’s reaction, Bran ...