xLogan

We will grind their bones into powder!” H e finally exclaimed. Ugh, haha, I always have to tell people this! Okay, in a quote, if it doesn't end with a ...

Nick-picks, “Is anyone there?” M y voice was quiet from the lack of use. If the quote doesn't end with a comma it begins another sentence, so the next word ...

I looked around the room nothing but pure darkness. This sentence needs a comma, or something... and my mother she had died when I was little due to a physiological ...

Glad it's not your final draft, haha. It needs a lot of work as you have pointed out. Does the mountain in the background end 3/4 of the way? If ...

I say close it. I sometimes get on here just to chat on people, which is dumb. I need to start posting more stories and working on them and also ...

Thanks! Yeah, I just wrote it down one day. Thanks everyone for all the suggestions. I'll get to editing this someday. :D

Hey! Welcome to YWS! Rules have been explained already so no need for me to re-post them. I'm Logan (or X,) nice to meet you. If you need a review ...

Hey there! Welcome, I'm Logan. Here are the basic rules: • 3:1 - 4:1 ratio, for each story you post you need to do 3 - 4 reviews. • Keep ...

Just saw Paranormal Activity - it was pretty scary. I believe in spirits and such but it was fake. Katie Featherston and Micah Sloat are still alive and well, at ...

Yeah, I thought the same thing about the mass murderer or serial killer thing. I made Emily really intelligent for her age and much mature. Thanks for the review and ...

Wow, that's cool! I could imagine myself as an ant. You should've gone where there was grass so we could see what it looks like surrounded by grass and such. ...

Keep on the rambling! Okay, well, first of all we have a 4:1 ratio here. For each story you post you have to do 4 reviews! Keep chat-speak to a ...

Yeah, she killed him. In the next part I'm adding I'll be sure to put a flashback of some kind so people for sure will know! :)

Seems empty and a bit boring. I agree with ^ add some imagery so people can imagine it. It's cool - but a bit..empty, ya' know? Logan.

The last sentence is a bit off, may just be me. Congrats to June, 900th review! The first few lines were off for me also. It's good though, really cute ...