writergirl007

This is very interesting! I like it. I have some things that need help. "Wagging school how could you I thought we bought you up better then that.” I noticed ...

This is good. It is a little short. And...I think you should not make it so personal. Name your characters. And...if you do make it about yourself, at least name ...

This is really good! I love it! I do agree, though, it is a little vague. Maybe more detail or explanations? Also, I found a few things that needed to ...

Okay...this was well written. Really long. I found some mistakes. "She also tried to cast out of her memory and consciousness that tens of pairs of eyes observed her wearily" ...

This is good. There was a part where you used that twice and it was not needed. I think there should be more description of the day. This is really ...

Catalina looked up at the young man beside her. His grey eyes held wisdom far beyond his seventeen years. His blond hair moved with the wind as if it had ...

Well...I agree with Firestarter when he said this was very cliche. It reminds me a lot of Eragon. Aside from that...I found a few things that need to be changed. ...

Excellent! I can't believe that the girl dies! That's so sad! :cry: But, it was well done. There were two places that I thought you could improve, but I didn't ...

Thanks Crysi. This really helps. I will work on it. It may be a while though. Perhaps tommarrow? i don't know when. I have added a little more description, but ...

Thanks, Claud. I really liked this poem and thought I would see what others thought. I'm glad that you critiqued it! That really helps. I made the changes you suggested. ...

The cross is a symbol of God above, And when He gave His blood out of love. A towering structure that reaches the sky, A wonderful blessing; a hidden disguise. ...

I think this was a great start. Claudette covered mostly everything (punctuation wise). I, however, like -ly words and find them very descriptive. By the way, thanks for your review ...

Your point is very valid. I was jsut surprised seeing that they were close. And, thanks for replying to every comment. It is really nice to see your side! Writergril

It's really good! A bit of a twist I see. :wink: Now, you can post the next chapter! I found a few misspellings, but that was all that I saw ...

I like this story. It's really good. I almost cried when I thought Gabrial died. There is a part that is confusing. It is when she sees that he looks ...