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Re: Orange Peel and Apple Pips
Well, personally, I don't like rhymes, they annoy me, but maybe I can help you with other aspects of your poem. First off, think about your beats, syllables, whatever you ...
Jun 25, 2008 -
Re: Unbroken
I'd like some feedback . . . I'm submitting this someplace if you think it's good enough. Unbroken Closed bluebells, holding morning’s promise. Dawn like the sea and shore torn ...
Jun 25, 2008 -
Re: crying
My interpretation: The narrator is closed up and not letting him/herself love anyone because of something that happened in the past and to make it all better again he/she needs ...
Dec 15, 2007 -
Re: The Pain of Forgetting
This is slightly personal, it's like a memoir in verse. A memory of when I was younger, I'm not sure how old. You know how sometimes you can't stop thinking ...
Dec 14, 2007 -
Re: The Prodigal
Sorry! Forgot to say this: I don't know how to punctuate a poem, so I didn't. Just though you guys should know the reason!
Dec 14, 2007 -
Re: The Prodigal
Okay: first thing I've posted. This I wrote a while ago and I really hate the beginning. But just let me know what you think. :oops: The Prodigal velvet_on_a_moonlit In ...
Dec 14, 2007 -
Re: The Reason
You really have a deep connection with yourself. If that make any sense :D What I mean is that you can describe yourself so well. In your poem you have ...
Dec 14, 2007 -
Re: Purple Memories
I really like the last few lines: " Drenched in memories dyed in deep purple, Will I be able to see my true self In your eyes?" . . . ...
Dec 7, 2007 -
Re: Atrophy For Lovers, Amorphy For Others
Okay: Loved the description and title (beautiful) especially in the last, um, stanza? paragraph? Well, anyway, a tad confuzzling but heart, heart, heart!
Dec 7, 2007
