victoria781

I wrote this 2 years ago. I do see I need to work on punctuation :/ lol A lost stone moreso, thrown away given a look, a second glance perhaps ...

[quoteMy love, I hate you,This passion in my heart,Stems not from unending springs of love,It comes from the stench of the stale river,Where we once knew love.The mantle of love ...

This is great. Far beyond other poems I've read here today :) Great imagery and use of metaphor

"Days teach me To always dream However, it may never come true But that's the best way To live my life through." Should be: "Days teach me To always dream. ...

Great piece :) You should work to omit all "I" 's from the poem to strengthen it.

You reduce me; I am so small. Of all things in this world You are what breaks me To this. I am so small. Nothing else; You blind me from ...

Imagine me and you on a ship, on a broken wooden mass; we float. The waves, which toss and turn our hope, would stop and we would find ourselves alone ...

The stain will not come out. Perhaps I have not tried enough or really cared to change it. A single drop of red wine; another anniversary. Sipping from a glass ...

Great job :) I love the image it gave me of a choir howling to the moon. Imagery is always the first I look for in a poem. So with ...

I'm just slightly confused. In the beginning, are you outside and looking into the sky? Maybe you could say "when staring into space" and "looking at the stars, I feel ...

Hey :) I say you need to focus on an image. It feels like a list, so I'm not understand/getting the emotion you intend for me to feel. You do ...

Fantastic :) It's a great little piece of story. Talent if you were able to write that up quickly on your phone. I would wish it to be a little ...

Don't focus on it while writing. Just write whatever comes to mind, and if necessary, make small changes. In the meantime, read other poems and learn a bit about the ...

Tracing the outline of her face, from a photograph... It's a cloudy day in the mind of memory. The curve of a forehead is lost in thick air. Sharpened mountain ...

Second line: Would be like an (and no comma) Fourth line: Did you mean "wandering I liked it well enough. I say it could probably have flowed better; the verses ...