theotherone

Rated 16+ for the slight cursing... Sorry, it's part of the characters and the mood. :) The ride wasn’t long, even though we were a good fifteen minutes from the ...

Hello there. :) I won't do the nitpicks because I'm don't really want to do this right now, but you can PM me, or just write on my wall if ...

Hello there! :) I'm going to quote all of this, and comment in it, if it's okay. My comments will be in bold, and in red, the correction. Ok here ...

Hello there. :) I'll begin with the nitpicks... well I don't think you have much. :) Cass’ voice rose, her anxiety increasing. He dared look up into Cass’ eyes and ...

Hello there. :) This is a really nice piece, which a lot of girls and guys can relate to. Sayen stood there, the wind whipping through her dark hair. I ...

Hello there. :) Well, these are pretty good! 1. I love this one, especially the flower. I think it's a nice touch. :) 2. I love the second one too, ...

Hello there, I'm here to do a review as requested! :) I was now stuck going to third period , and it promised to be pure torture. Going to third ...

Hello there. :) Well, this is beautiful, but I still got a few more things you can work on to make it more beautiful. :) Her arms seem awfully long, ...

Hello there. :) I jumped out of bed, pulled off my pink cami and silver boxers (my pjs for that night) , and changed into the yellow dress that I ...

Hello there. :) Well, I'm a little confused with this. They are best friends, and she mentioned that she knew Angela was looking at a guy... Didn't she knows what ...

Hello there. :) "You have only your brother and I , Lea, and I and it makes me worry about you." I switched the 'and I' so it's easier to ...

Hello there. :) Well, another great chapter! This is coming along great, and I think you've got the emotions right regarding Tyler and Melody. The way she panics is just ...

Hello there. :) I have some nitpicks for you. My heart was beating faster as I closed the window. I ran downstairs, trying to be as quiet as I could ...

Hello there. :) So you want to slow down, right? Well I don't think you have to slow down that much, since this is a short story. And if it's ...

Hello. :) Well... This was interesting. I liked it, except for the relationship between Melody and her mother. I don't get why her mother is like that, and why Melody ...