thefireinmeisJC

I'm glad you look forward to see my work. I feel pressured to make it extra exciting now :D Don't you just love the "welcoming" feel? Interesting. I don't think ...

HI! Welcome to YWS! I've only been here for 3 days so, I'm still new technically. But its a lot of fun because you can get critiques on your work ...

WOW. i know this forum is for constructive criticsm but i'm afraid i can't give any. Your rhyming was right, and flow was awesome...I like how all the syllables match ...

Ooh. This was interesting! The first few lines were a little hard to understand but once I realized it was about suicide I became *interested* in it (if that makes ...

I don't believe that there's actually a such thing as a really bad opening line because the more you make it "bad" the more the reader wants to read on ...

Sorry, I'm going to have to agree with Jiggity. Nice poem, good flow, and grammar etc but you really didn't "express" anything here. And it kind of contradicts itself. First ...

weird yet true. 8/10 :o

first of all, thanks for the critique on my work :D I'm *sad* to say that I can't do the same to yours. I usually have trouble reading someone's elses ...

Thanks to both of you! Its good to know that some things that I thought was clear or obvious in my writing, you didn't understand...I will work on that. I'm ...

Screams fill my mind Anger rushes through my veins Guilt gnaws its way to my soul Yet I am not the one in pain I feel the resistance I feel ...

I'm not necessarily known for being a poet (nor a writer actually) though its fun. See how you like it :D When will this moment stop Where the grass tickles ...

Hope you enjoy! :D sorry its a little long Chapter 1 I remember the coldness of the water that hit my face that afternoon. Some of it found its way ...

ha, I don't want to give up on the story. It was harsh though I want to know all the mistakes I made...even though I have no intention of being ...

Line by line critique is fine with me. You can be as harsh as you want. I want people to be harsh.

I love the plot! Have you written anything yet?