tgirly

Some lines you capitalize the first letter and others you don't. Maybe it's just me, but I think you should capitalize them all. I like the poem alot. Great job.

Adam = Alan Kayla=Kayti, Kacy, Kara Seek N Destroy=D.C.? Seth=Swenson Aaron=Eric Logan=Lincoln

i got bit by an ant today too!

way better drawer than me

I ike it, though all the spelling and grammatical errors were distracting. Edit before you post, please. :) Welcome to YWS, good luck.

I hurried over to the police station. They said my sister was there. Again. She always called me. I wish she would call Mom. I wish I was seventeen again ...

"As I fell asleep everything felt slow motion" doesn't make sense. Also, how'd she find herself sitting ON her brother's room? He was stille having trouble getting used TO them. ...

you shouldn't give paragraph 3 with long ago. You've already stated that it was a long time ago. I liked it a lot and couldn't find any spelling errors. I ...

Deleted.

You should probably break the first sentence in paragraph 3 up into more sentences. Also, the second-to-last paragraph before the first cross things is confusing. Sean decided he would take ...

I think you should split "the thunder leaves the sun comes only to find" into two lines between leaves and the. Really good poem.

It started out slow, just talking about the sky, I began to wonder if it would be a story. But it is written very well, so even if it didn't ...

Name: Violet (Vi) Thompson Age:20 Appearance: light brown hair always in a ponytail, tan, noticeable cheekbones, dark grey eyes, average height, muscular but still feminine. History: At a school for ...

Love it!!

There's something to be said for short poems, but I think it might be a little too short, it feels like it's a part of a longer poem. Excellent word ...