smaur

I don't know if this is still an issue or if you've figured out a way to resolve it, but things to consider: - Find a couple of people who ...

It definitely helps to immerse yourself in different genres and styles. You can find heaps of book / story recommendations both here and everywhere else on the internet — it ...

I second Eimear's opinion, but instead of an internal "monologue", maybe condense it to one or two short sentences of thought that suggest she is thinking the complete opposite? Something ...

Hey! Welcome to YWS. : ) Sounds like you will fit in here pretty well. Also, yay for people who write science fiction! There are definitely not enough in the ...

The new chat is great. As in, Tony-the-Tiger-great. Nate, you are a superhero. (Am I the only one who thinks "Flashdance" when they see "Flashchat"?)

all the world is blind This time, he is going to die. He can’t remember how to breathe, how to take full deep inhaling gulps of oxygen to shoot his ...

I would hardly say they're "feminist" or "non-comformist" but then again, I was never a Disney person until I hit the Lion King.

Celtx is essentially the same as Final Draft, only free. You might want to put your descriptions in caps or something so you can differentiate it from other things. Um...don't ...

It's actually the breatest. Or the grest.

I skimmed through your screenplay quickly, and the formatting looks about right. The only thing to note is that in the description of the action (i.e. the non-dialogue bits), you ...

This is srs bizness, man. Backstreet Boys. Although Aqua was better than both. Oh poppy teen bands of my youth, how I still love you. I remember fights used to ...

The idea of doing a mecha-themed story is awesome, but you get bogged down a lot. You mentioned that the length might be a deterrent, and it kind of is; ...

Elizabeth I was pretty awesome. So was her sister: Mary, Queen of Scots. I agree with the "Elizabeth I was pretty awesome" part. However, her sister was not Mary, Queen ...

Voila . Anyone else? Eh eh eh?

I was kind of hesitant to write a review for this (that is, before you posted on my critique list) because, well, I tend to get pretty in-depth with critiquing. ...