psudiname

can you review the first chapter of my novel? thanks

To begin with, the piece has beautiful diction and imagery. instead of just describing her hair as brown, you chose "mahogany". I was constantly impressed throughout the piece with how ...

Can you review the first chapter of my novel?

Welcome to YWS! pretty much all of the people I've met here are cool, so you happen to be in luck. if you have any questions about the site, or ...

Chapter One Matt I went over the plan one final time to make sure everyone knew what they were doing. Raleigh was smiling broadly, anticipating the job to come. I ...

Welcome to YWS! As you'll probably notice if you searched for other writing sites, we are one of the few sites with a multitute of active members! everyone here you ...

A short and sweet opening. Several parts were somewhat confusing, but most of the peice was well done. It opens with an exciting scene, which is a good tactic for ...

Chapter One Kara's lips felt smooth and clean to the touch, which was no surprise given how much money she must have spent on lip balm. She sighed with delight ...

If I had to use one adjective to describe this peice, I would probably go with "chilling". It was very well written, and had a refreshingly dark mood, but oftentimes ...

Chapter One Kara's lips felt smooth and clean to the touch, which was no surprise given how much money she must have spent on lip balm. She sighed with delight ...

Ok, the rules are that each person has to submit a place, time, situation, and two or three charecters each with a different role. then the author below that person ...

this was pretty well done but there were a few instances that bugged me. granted, almost all of them are probably justifiable because of plot constraints, and other complications, but ...

good opening! It does a good job at grasping the attention of the reader, and urging him to read further. I particularly liked the description, which you have always been ...

Paul sat in his room, repeating silent prayers and holding his bible tight to his chest. He was not surprised when a voice he knew all too well sounded from ...

Chapter twelve Dean's thoughts were already in motion as the group walked towards the fortress that they would be shortly invading. He smiled broadly at the thought of the assault ...