piepiemann22

I'm not really going to coment until you finish, but can't you come up with origanal names. You could of at least warned me before using my name. So far ...

I like the basic idea, but it needs some work. 1-Like Claudette said it doesn't flow to well. Read over it a couple of time and listen to it or ...

Alright, thanks. I'll see what i can do.

I lifted my rifle and stood next to Lance. "Can I ask you something?" "Sargent?" "You see, you shouldn't call me that. My rank is tainted. You the first person ...

Hikaru appeared behing Sagara's back grabing him and locking him. "Do it now Sakumo!" Sakumo jumped and preformed the hand signs, snake, rooster, monkey, boar, horse, tiger, Katon fireball jutsu. ...

Isumi, Kakashi, and Seikyou sped towards the enamy. Soon they came apon a small clearing with a stream near by. "Isumi, wear's the enamy?" Asked Kakashi. "There here." Two ninja ...

Well, for now this story book is dead unless i can find new people or the old ones come back. me and Chris can't write it by ourselves. PLEASE COME ...

Thanks for taking the time to read it. I confess I had little time to look it over. When i finished i was given no time really to look it ...

lots already been said so if i repeat anything i don't mean to. 1-Way to descriptive. When you do this you start telling in stead of showing. It leaves little ...

Life went on as it usually did. The birds flew, the sun rose and set, and people went on. For a time that was all there was. Day by day ...

6/10 It's origanal at least right?

Got it. man Chris, you need to look into this a little bit more.

Okay, is any one there or am I all alone?

Ranza looked at Aliena. The moon light was spackling on her face. "You look beautiful tonight." Aliena looked back at Ramza who was smiling. She blushed. "So, what..." Ramza heard ...

i tried to move the Steam tank on my own, but no luck. The small man, most likely a Gaelk, let out a groan telling me to stop, or at ...