onceuponatim3xo

If you could crit this I'd be so grateful :D

Thanks very much for the crits you guys! :D It helps a lot. Quick question: does this event seem realistic or are there any major flaws with it that I ...

actually, i did mention it. Oh. :lol: You should probably just say something like "The squire, Thai, (did this and that)" for people like me who don't think all of ...

This was a bit over-bearing, you seem to just jump into the torture, and there's lots of it, so it's hard to read such a story. Maybe if you had ...

Hey, this was good. Good job! :D I especially liked how there was some mystery as to what was going on at the factory (hopefully, you'll explain why they were ...

Great Job! There are a few grammar and spelling mistakes, but other than that it was good. I've got a question though: “Then, why did you ask her to cover ...

Great job, the only thing I think that you could improve on would be the pace. You may have wanted to go for a rushed pace for this scene, but ...

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Thank you so much for critting :D I'm probably going to make a new way for him to escape (any suggestions?? :D ) But, I can't really think of anything ...

Thanks, I'll probably tweak it a little more, but for now will this do? He turned to the dogs who were coming closer and closer. They bounded toward him with ...

okay, so I edited the whole coin thing, hopefully this works out better. :D

Excellent Job!! I especially loved your characterization and dialogue, also you did a great job with descriptions. There a few things theat I'd like to suggest though: {Chapter 1} The ...

Great job on this! It was much, much better than the first half! (: I don't really have anything to say, except I was a little confused when you said ...

Excellent job!! This was extremely well written!! I think that this could - as you'd asked - stay as a stand alone, but you would definitely need a reason as ...

Thanks for splitting it into 2 parts! :D So, on to the crit: Since Esme got most of the quotes in the context - I'll just tell you my impressions ...