olivia1987uk

My mother let out an exasperated sigh. “She doesn't believe me.” she said to the older man. He smiled, “And can you blame her, we'll just have to show her, ...

The amendments are already done so I can't really comment on the improvements its made other than looking at what has been suggested. The suggestions I've briefly scanned look excellent ...

Hmmmmmm Well written overall, but I'm not the biggest fan of sexually explicit writing. I think it is much more powerful when expressed via euphemisms. Just an opinion I found ...

Hi! What a happy little piece! Lol! It's pretty good to be honest...your shiny new laptop must have you very inspired. I don't like happy endings either so all is ...

The premise on this is good...I like it There are a couple of typos in the form of capitalisation and other minor things, but I won't patronise you and point ...

Ooooh first to comment on this Now I wish I had the time to completely check through for everything, but if you don't mind, I'll leave that for someone else ...

Really enjoyed reading this for the following reasons... - The fact the characters names are uncommon and not overused within the text. - Your colloquial, yet grammatically excellent, narrative style.

I love this...and anybody who knows me will realise I NEVER say that straight away! Everyone has obviously picked up on all the niggling little problems judging by the sheer ...

I think the majority of so called "mistakes" have been picked up by the other member and fellow instructor that have already critiqued your work. SO, trying not repeat what ...

Taking a deep breath, I clicked on the box labelled “slim” under the body description section. It was only a dating website. Nobody told the truth, did they? I would ...

Hi I liked this, don't get me wrong, but it almost seemed more like a descriptive piece of writing rather than a short story...I don't think enough action happened to ...

Sometimes, trying to find originality is like trying to find a needle in a haystack; or a four leaf clover. To be original was not the main objective of Aidan’s ...

Hey Sorry to state the obvious but we have to be careful about including things like vampires and werewolves with the current Twilight saga being so popular and mainstream.... you ...

Hi... Are you sure you wouldn't prefer this as a script? Even if you didn't and you wanted to keep this amount of dialogue you need to add more description ...

eeeek lol