napalmerski

Aha! Basic grammar, basic readiblity and plausability - this is what my mini-thriller is crying for. I'd be very happy to see what you make of it And at half ...

The first (larger) half of my little thriller novella with sci-fi elements is up and running It would be very happy to get some jashbagabaldo attention, and so would I ...

Yo, I don't do grammar and stuff, because I suck at it. I did notice various unstable tense-jumping and commas huddling in inappropriate nooks, but that's not my thing to ...

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Yo, I just read the three chapters. A very pleasant and snappy three chapters. The rhythm of the narrative was disrupted only by Santo's lyricism, and I found it amusing ...

Hey, just read it: I like the premise! Very Philip Jose Farmer type of beginning, which in my book is always welcome. I have just three major point-out issues: a) ...

Hey, carelessaussie13, your comment is one every writer dreams of reading. You made my day! Evening, that is. You're very generous, I can see quite well that that my text ...

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Haha, it's still unreadable, a line of empty space between paragraphs should do the trick, anyway, I pledge a review in the coming days, even if I have to copy/paste ...

OK, here's the reuploaded version. Just to use this opportunity to draw your attention to the quote by Gaiman down below, that most likely my ideas for how to make ...

Yo, here's my take on chapter 2. Now, I went for a more detailed approach here, so don't be disturbed when you see the mess I've made by my interference. ...

True about the wrong section, but as it's here...:) First, I have to say that the characterisation of dad was very well done - the elements of his former versus ...

Hey, well... There's lots of grammar stuff to do here, but I don't do grammar:) You'll probably see it all for yourself when you go through it with a clear ...

Too right Sponk, as it is, it ain't elegant enough to be read for the joy of reading, and there aren't any hooks to hold the wandering attention of the ...

Yo, I don't do plot, grammar and characters, I do sentence structure and internal consistency. Here we go:) Quiet began to descend on the room, as the theater light slowly ...