miyaviloves

Wow, that was really good, originial, i was looking through your portfolio and this is the first thing i read its amazing and flows brilliantly. Well done, you deserve a ...

Well done! I gave up chocolate but oh my i could not give up internet!

No, i stopped believing ages ago. i guess i always thought the tooth fairy was real until i found that pot Mom had with my teeth in. Honestly, parents ruin ...

Loved that. Its simple and effective, it works so well and has a lovely flow. Nothing more to be said. Meevs x

hmm it was a bit short I would like to have seen a bit more, it was good but i think that this could have been longer and a lot ...

Ok, i liked this, but one line annoyed me just ever so slightly and that was: Because my cushion is too wet, When i first read it, i was like...whhhat? ...

Great, this is very very good! I am also, along with Mimi waiting for chapter 2, your characters are developing nicely and you have a very nice vocabulary range :D ...

Taken down due to publishing

Taken down due to publishing

:O ...wow..... :O! lol very good peice of work you have here, very sad :( definalty a topic that i think more people need to writeabout, maybe need to write ...

Is this about Micheal jackson, I'm guessing so :D hmm just take Shadows advice about the random capitals and the number 2 and well its good! I like your poetry, ...

Aww thats sad :( And i can relate to this, maybe thats why i like it so much. The rhyming works in places such as: A small child wakes, crying ...

Right, this is really good and its a very good start, i want to read more! I like the transistion (is that the right word?) From the first person speaking ...

Taken down due to publishing

this si good for someone who dosent really do poetry, much better than my attempts! all the crit work has been done for you, I just wanted to say how ...