mistielovesyou

This was okay, but kind of cheesy. The ending probably wouldn't have the impact on the reader that you wanted. That's because you started out with a serious tone in ...

Is this a beginning? Because if it is this is really good. It's fine by itself, of course, but it'd be a nice beginning. The only thing I have to ...

This story was good, albeit a little disjointed. I was confused with the second "flashback", and I thought he had come back to life. The ending was nice though, and ...

This was really good. I liked the insanity from the boy "Ted" and the story as a whole. Although the third line in the story "His eyes were completely serious" ...

This is okay, but the story is a little implausible. If people actually knew this guy was doing this (like Jenny did), wouldn't he be arrested? No one, especially the ...

This is awesome. I loved how you made the story flow easily so you could see it vividly in your head. The emotions in the story were conveyed subtly, and ...

I agree that the writing was a little flat for me, but it was okay. This peace needs a lot more dramatice voice to become better. Nothing much happened, so ...

Good story! This was good writing, and it was an interesting story. I especially loved the beginning, and how it seemed like a fairytale. However, the ending was little abrupt ...

I love this!! It was simple, well-written, and conveyed its point very well. I enjoyed how the protagonist was evil but never really had it come back to bite him, ...

I thought this was really good and well organized. I liked how the whole end half of the story was just a foolish prediction, and I liked the little plot ...

Well, that was interesting. The thing is, I didn't get that he killed himself until i reread the end a few times. Maybe you should hint more at what he ...

I liked this. Very nice point and context. Like others said, another character wouldn't hurt.

Was this just a short story? What I mean is, is this the end of it? If this is the end it was just..okay. You wrote this really well, but ...

This was something I wrote from the quote "anger suffers when grief withdraws". Obviously, I got a little carried away. She stood in the doorway, staring down at his peaceful ...

Oh, you guys: this is a fantasy world. Which is why the sky changes colors like that.... It's not a real world..