kitrosemon13

Tell me something I don't know, I am not perfect: nor are you. Tell me you hate me, though it's obvious that you do. Make me suffer, my pain is ...

I wrote this so it could be like a timeline, from the ice ages-world war one (or) two- and to modern day. (:

You definitely have potential for drawing, I liked the picture though, I think you got her hair right (: Try using color next time, so it can be more vibrant. ...

Open doors: shattered windows, Careless whispers fill the pillars. Here we are together, with each other thats all we need. Find yourself, take your time. Love yourself, I'll be fine. ...

To build a house tall not narrow, with a hunters weapons; bow and arrow. Mammouth skin and leather boots, a gun and knife a spit salon. A workmans bare arms ...

I did not connect with this poem, but it is not bad. A few changes need to be made though: Love is hard, Hard like a stone, A stone easy ...

This poem was very good, I liked the flow of rhyme. Overall there is not anything wrong with it that I can see. Keep writing! -M.

Well you didn't give me much to work with here but I'll try at the simple basics. Try for a few commas and periods. Try not to make it choppy. ...

This poem is very lovely I only found two very small errors in this: This illusion of love i'd try to remember, you'd try to forget. -i'd should be I'd ...

This poem was very confusing, try to write another word other than feel. Use synonyms in a thesaurus and try to rewrite it, it was a bit difficult to read ...

Well, first and far most of it when I was reading this I felt like after every 3 words or so you'd skip a line. When writers do that they ...

I loved everything about this poem, I liked how you opened up with the word rain and ended with the word rain. It does describe rain but I felt you ...

Okay, I liked the haiku's very much. Only a few nitpicks I think you should change: Silence is beauty As all is now rendered still -now should be know, yes ...

I was a bit let down by the flow of it, it seemed choppy and you used too many commas and it made it a little difficult to read. The ...

This was an okay poem I did not feel it much at all though, try helping the reader see what you are seeing, we cannot see inside your head (: ...