kathy45662

Hey, good story. I noticed a couple of grammar mistakes. their (bald) maths teacher. Take out the s on maths teacher. It's only one teacher. :) Mr Grady inquired Mr. ...

I'm making the chapters shorter. Like the 2nd one will be when they leave the city for the day and return to a disaster.

I meant temporary character not a main character.

It goes pretty quick for a short story. If I read this in a magazine I'd be like....where's the rest? I like the idea you have. Grammar has already been ...

Beginning of my re-write. This is part of Chapter 1. I want to know how it ocmpares to the other versions and what everyone else thinks of this. Does it ...

Thanks. This really helps. I think my novel just about needs re written. It's supposed to be a peaceful city but I need to change things even if it means ...

I love your poetry! You always have done a good job of the ones I've read. Sorry don't have anythin to imporve these poems but I really like them the ...

Please delete this thread, for another is needed to be read.

LOl I wrote this a LONG time ago and thanks for the help! i won't spoil it for you that way you'll leave feedback on the other chapters. Once the ...

lol. Thanks for the help. No most of what I write is short stories about romance, and this kind of came to me out of the blue. I wrote the ...

My Soldier In Gray You packed away, I told you to stay. You are so brave, My soldier in gray. I told you no, And you said yes. I said ...

Um...nice but not much to look at to critique. Is there more to come? autum should be Autumn

Please review! I haven't finished! I know most of you don't have babies, but if you have a little brother or sister, maybe you can help me add some more. ...

Welcome! I hope this site doesn't keep you bored! Lots of entertaining works on here to read! Welcome to the family Mr. Bored! :P

I'd give it an 8. Why? Because no song or poem, or anything, is a perfect 10! I don't see any errors as far as grammar and I love the ...