jumpingsheep

Wow!!! This is a killer first chapter! It was very well written; the grammar and spelling was fantastic! I also loved your diverse vocabulary, and how well you laid out ...

Very mysterious chapter! I liked the cliffhanger ending. I noticed that sometimes you italicized thoughts, however, "Wow, I guess the trapdoor wasn't so secretive if it was in plain view, ...

I enjoyed the dialogue between Talon and Smile in this chapter! I think it was a really smart way to characterize them! I also liked how well this was written; ...