joshuapaul

Thanks for the helpful reviews. Edited once. I still alot of punctuation and things I am unsure about, I need a nitpick...

I have decided this piece - with a little tweaking - will be used as my entry into the New Zealand National Short Stroy Competition. I therefore would greatly appreciate ...

Hi Conrad, Jp here. Nice story. It did however, feel a little incomplete but something still rung through an struck a chord with me. A certain recognition; the allegory/metaphor was ...

Thanks alot for your kind words Jennafina and Loveless

Note: I am so disgustingly out of practice, it's been months since I've written anything longer than a page. Tear this to shreds for me-- be brutally honest. Hey Jp ...

Glitter Henry’s feet fell, one after the other over leaves and damp twigs. “It’s just up ahead,” Called Kate, turning her head as she trotted along. He jogged cautiously, ready ...

Wow. I seldom read a story that has me competely and utterly hooked. As I read on I didn't stop to reread an awkward sentence, or pause and wonder syntax ...

Wow, I am surprised to see how many people had only good things to say. I'm sorry but I must break the trend... Cliches, cliches, cliches... I have a writing ...

I am not familiar with the painting but I feel I could now easily recognise it. You used great imagery and the dialogue was fantastic. I respectfully disagree with the ...

This was intereting, I'm not gunna bore you with a full analysis, it seems you other critics have extacted about as much nitpicks and errors as is possible. I am ...

Hello, JP here, hope this helps! Woah, okay, first attempt at writing in present tense. The entire story will not be like this, but can you guys help me out! ...

Hey here to review. Being something of a memoir - rather than a short story - I wasn't looking for any moral or theme or general idea yet something still ...

WD thank you! you are amazing... will PM if I have any concerns and just to clrify the Hero is a caricature, he is of little consequence or significance to ...

Hey just a quick critique hope im not too harsh! I ran down the streets in my school uniform consisting of; a white blouse, red tie, red plaid skirt that ...

by saying it was 'written on the spot' you made it appear spontaneous and un proof-read, my 'line by line' analysis dealt with alot of nit picks most of which ...