jellybean

Helloooo! I shall be humoring you today. :) I can definitely see the science fiction elements here (the airship, Sara's fangs, etc.), however, I don't really see much of a ...

Hey Lauren; you have no idea how much I loved this! :) This could fall into a couple different genres...science fiction and romance, but I'm leaning more towards science fiction ...

Hello! All my comments will be in red. :) Preface I really don't think a preface is necessary here. You could replace "Preface" with "Chapter One" and the story would ...

I love this! I think the idea is original and awesome and amazing and...okay, I'm running out of peppy adjectives haha. Anyway, I just have one little nit-picky thing. Your ...

Hello HonoriaHayden! Grammar/spelling-wise you did very well, however there are a couple other things you need to work on. (1) A Hook. Right now, the opening line that you have ...

Hello, I haven't been on here in months, but I'm back! :) Alright, let's get started... General Impression You have a nice, solid beginning; I didn't find anything seriously wrong ...

The children tell me without whispers. I can see it in their dreams, burning through their eyelids, swelling into a storm. Save us, they say, save us. I thought that ...

This kinda reminds me of freshman year...walking into a big scary high school and trying to avoid looking at all the grown up seniors... except this doesn't really count as ...