jasmine12

So, I'm rather confused about the whole Carmen/Sophia thing. I thought she liked him liked him (i know, so fifth grade) that confused me. Also, you said in the previous ...

UGH! What is with Carmen? Why is he with Nora when he clearly likes Sophia? They seem to have a special bond...but im not sure if it goes all the ...

Hmm. This is becoming reallying interesting. Very mysterious. I like Carmen. He seems like an alright character. You painted a really nice picture with the ancient and gave enough background ...

Ash! You did it! I am so proud! haha. I've never read something so...what's the word, so ready? So ready to be published. Even though it was only the preface, ...

Do you mind? It's the first part out of four. They aren't that long. It's historical romantic fiction. Please and Thank you

One thing before I begin, sorry if i make any spelling mistakes or anything like that. Quick question, is this past or present tense? I get confused sometimes with differenciating ...

Do you mind? There are four parts...and soon there will be more. It's for school so I need it to be prefect. Some harsh or nice reviews would be helpful!! ...

Jeremiah ****Part Two**** “Brat!” my mother exclaimed, throwing a dirty rag in my direction. I dodged it and it fell to the floor like with a light thud. “You know ...

Hmm. this seems tricky. I can see the dilema. The thing that set of the sirens was that...you started backwards...i dont think i could do that in fear of what ...

This is fiction? Correct? Weither it has a 'supernatural power' or not, should not matter. If you let your imagination run wild, you can make dropping a pencil supernatural. If ...

I thrust aside anyone I ran into, stumbling over already dead comrades. This sentence doesnt have that flowing rythym you've created. It's awkward. This is a depressing piece. I loved ...

Jeremiah ****Part One**** “Jeremy, I’ve heard you speak of her all day. Please, put it out of mind,” my good friend Jesse pleaded with me. We started working once Mr. ...

Thats an problem many writers face when they transition between writing in the first person, then the third. You just have to be careful when writing tags like that to ...

Dreamwalker, I was so taken with your story, so wrapped up in the words, I could not critique it. My apologize. But, as I see before me, many have already ...

Hi! The night was dark, darker than normal. Why was it darker? heading towards the one place she had ever known in her whole life. I don't really like the ...