jasmine12

But then, Susannah wasn’t really a normal person by anyone’s instead of starting with But. try Then again. yea? I continued reading all the way through in an unwavering. I'm ...

I wrote the second part to see if this is really going somewhere. If it just sounds dumb, please tell me. Seriously, it would be great if I didn't waste ...

Hello. I am really excited to see where you take this story. I've loved it since I first read it and want to read more. I couldn't find any mistakes ...

Hello, I'm Selena and I want to suck your blood. Okay, not the most creative but its all I could think of.

I thought the first paragraph sounded kind of choppy, but I'm gald it didn't. I think we should banish conjunctions from the English language. It would make things easier, wouldn't ...

Hello there! Looks really good. Who was I kidding? What was the point of going to school? What was the point, when everyone despised me and I didn't have a ...

EDIT Chapter Four What Rules? He opened his mouth about to say something but the doorbell rang. It rang all throughout the house. “That’s probably the movers. They moved one ...

Hey, just thought I'd do a quick one over for you. This is what I saw (and sadly it isn't much.) They saw only the black shoelaces of his old ...

There is one thing that everyone has missed. Emo isn't the worst thing out there anymore. The new stereotypical teen that goes on myspace and posts pictures of their crazy ...

Hello. Can I just say how intimidating your writing is to me. Ha, I feel like a new-b after reading this. I honestly found little mistakes and right after I ...

I dont want to sound weird here or anything, but Americans call flip flops thongs too. Not the newer generation but like older people, because back then, they werent called ...

Basically, a guy tells you, a girl tells her friends. That is the typical girl thing to do. But I thought the main purpose of this was boys. Write your ...

I agree with Sofi on this one. Lord of the Flies in my opinion is a huge snore fest!!!

I will most deffinitly take you up on that offer. Since i know little to nothing about England, :smt100 writing this book will be extremely difficult. I'm thinking that Rex ...

Haha thanks. I've always had the issue of describing but my dialog has always been strong. I put the '...' in there because she had slept all morning due to ...