ireylcadence

Aladdin I had given David the biggest eye-roll when he had told me I was going into that hole. Did he really expect me to go anywhere where maggot-ridden bodies ...

Aladdin And what a sight it was to see, when I finally found my way into the open. The others, gathered around in a silence weighing a thousand years. Where ...

Thanks for the review. :)

Ah sorry, I couldn't get on the computer before. Correct me if I get anything wrong, might have missed a few details. Aladdin My body snapped to and suddenly, the ...

It overcomes me like a sun-washed Himalayan peak. Perhaps I might blame it on our age of sins But in the end, it is I that wronged. The avalanche starts ...

Definitely like this one. However, there are somethings with the flow that you need to work on--for example, the last line. Try the old "read-it-out-loud" method. That line just seems ...

Simple and sweet. It's rare to find a poem that is well-developed and concise all at the same time. This is a great piece. You might want to add some ...

Very lyrical indeed. :) You might, however, want to read this out loud to yourself. Though overall, the syllables flow very well, there are some parts where the rhythm stumbles, ...

Very nice. I'll bet you you can put that on metrolyrics and no one would even notice it's not a real song. ;) Are you going to put music to ...

Definitely sing-able. :) What type of music would you set it to, though? It sounds like Country, but I could be wrong. Mitch said let's marry here, Gale said, “we'll ...

Name: Aladdin Age: 7 Hometown(if known)- Northeastern USA. Not exactly sure. Picture- Personality- Slightly obnoxious, big ego, because he knows that he's smart. He might be small, but he can ...

It's great that you delved so deeply into the topic and described it with such imagination and detail. That's what too many writers seem to have a problem with, so ...

It's too soon for this to die. :( Validen I leave the little run-down tavern where I had been hiding before dusk and the rushing in of all the regular ...

Well written. It's not exactly poetic per se--sounds more like a translation of some ancient proverbs from some fantasy book. In fact, it actually sounds like Bible verses. :) This ...

Definitely would sound great as lyrics, as Jane said above. If you just wouldn't lie to me. ... If you would have trust in me. Those two lines should have ...