hobbes

yea......everybody kinda beat me to everything. but,this was excellent story line.this might be blasphemy or somthin(isn't it bad to like change the bible around? I don't remember Jesus having a ...

I gotta agree with those other people."dying while writing this rhyme" just kinda threw me off. I think you should do as professerrabbit said or just change the line all ...

uhhh.........not really. scribblingquill was more on to it. I guess it could be perceived as that, but that is not what the poem is about

yea.... I read this before and I wasn't sure if that was intentional or not ( 3rd and 4th lines), but that definitly threw me off. I had to reread ...

cool! i think that was flowy right up to the last line of the poem. also I think it should be in here for me. other than that thats cool ...

dude, your a fine poet and an excellent writer. don't give up. so yea......its really far your best poem yet. just do what medusa said and it'll be great. from-well, ...

awesome. It was pretty cool but you definitly need to write a sequal to The Hunt or whatever it's called.thanks for postin it. anonimously -anonimous

joey, it's break, not brake and to the writer dude, yeeeeaaaaaa.................what? this made no sense to me.that might just be me.

yes, I know. capitalize and grammar.I was pressed for time I also don't think "begun" is a word. please dont say " it's confusing. clarify it more. " because it's ...

the house moves under your feet. groaning,swaying flowing to the beat the stairs you enter take you below where the ordinary man would never dare go. the objects change, but ...

all around awesome.like BBB said, ya can't critique it but this is definitly awesicknasticool. this kinda reminds of the noises a stomp band would make.sooooooooooooooooooo...................yea.cooli

dude..........................I never read the very last line of that.your whole finally makes sense. post the last chapter so I can see the end!!!

first of all, FIREWORKS ARE AWESOME!!!! they EXPLODE!! whats cooler than that? now, if you also dislike vanhalen and the foo fighters,you really need to rethink your style. (haha) now, ...

dude,chillax. poetry is not about grammar and mechanics, but it's about the love of writing and it's a way to express feelings and thoughts to others. secondly, I know there ...

a song called " I wish I could change the world" (imagine that!)by ten years after inspired me to write this poem. I have it on my playlist if you ...