greenjay

If he ran Tsuunai to death—if he did not spare a moment to stop. this doesn't make much sense. Tsuunai possessed magicks. no "k" in magics Sweet! I like this ...

Sorry it took me so long, I was busy :P. Ooo! More characters and more conflicts :D. Not bad, good job. -greenjay

*As soon as the plan is anounced I can work that out. Go to head's tent though if you want. (Sorry he keeps flying off :P)*

Mathias I charged towards the wolf and suddenly jumped, grabbing a branch above me. I launced myself quickly upward, and when I knew she couldn't see me, I took flight, ...

Besides being blinded by the really bright colors it's good. 8/10

Mathias I smiled and stroked the horses nose. Then my face hardened and I looked at the two Rogues. "I need you to get these things for me," I said ...

9/10, hate that weirdo. *ahem* -GJ

Though J’engar-ai had expressed no intention of coming, there was an empty chair to the High King’s throne, announcing its presence though Ianna had not arrived. She arrived, as per ...

Hehe. 7/10 ~Me

Khor reached out and touched a milky black egg and quickly left fro fear of getting caught, this brought amusement to Rakari, causing her to laugh most of the way ...

Mathias I approached Quin and Tobias quickly, glancing around to make sure that the other one was no where about. "Listen you two, I have a job for you," I ...

Well, looks like I've been beat to it :D. I read Jack's article as well, and it was very helpful. I do have a few suggestions I might point out ...

#2 :D

Ya, I agree with you on that. But forgeting posting online and such, how long should a CHAPTER be? - :o

1000 words doesn't seem like much for a whole chapter. Might be though, I don't know that's why I'm asking :P. I'd say 1000 words or less is good for ...