emotion_less

I liked it... From my view of it, it's something that I think about a lot. Not sure if it's what you intended to put into it. So... yes... if ...

he awakes Shouldn't it be he awakens? All I can say is... lots of metaphors... that I didn't really connect the dots with...

I think I sort of got some parts of it... Anyway, it was very haunting at those parts I think I got. I guess that's something that you wanted to ...

I read somewhere that a disciplining spank or 'smack' for a child shouldn't be painful for more than a certain amount of minutes and/or cause bruises. I agree with that. ...

The pain is unbearable, I can't take it anymore, This part is pretty straightforward, which makes it cliche. Try describing the pain, instead of just saying it's 'unbearable.' The adrenaline ...

This was pretty good, but I think you need to work on rhythm and verb tense. Rhythm example: Two sinless beings with no meaning for shame One destiny: only to ...

I believe beguile means 'to deceive by using wit.' In fact, this is the more popular meaning. However, it could also mean 'to charm,' which is sort of what Sam ...

I agree with everyone above... very well done.

Done wonderfully once again... especially the end. I was a mere foolish rag doll cast aside, they uttered no words. Who are 'they'? I was a little confused at this ...

With the style this is written in, I think this was done just fine. I feel the gentle moment Of her heart beating The 'gentle moment' line was a bit ...

First off... doesn't the meet the rhthym of the road I think you mean doesn't meet the rhythm of the road. I liked the last two stanzas of the poem ...

There were many good ideas in this, but you would repeat the same ideas, which made it tiring to read. The idea of being frozen in her beauty was an ...

the time spent has grasped attention, so only now it's noticed that the light is a shade of blue [and, you know, that means you've been going about too long]. ...

Hmm... It was interesting. I liked the ending... Typos/spelling errors [or what I think are typos/spelling errors]: Slabskik and two other orks were thrown from their war buggy with an ...

Eh... It was kind of sappy... I know, I shouldn't be one to talk about sappiness... Lovely, I guess I can say, yet it made me laugh throughout... but it's ...