emotion_less

Nice descriptions. There are some good phrases the describe what is going on. However, you can't rely on one good phrase to make the whole sentence descriptive. It seems to ...

The last sentence of each stanza bothered me amd the second to the last stanza was sort of irritating. It's mostly just flow and wording that I didn't really like ...

It was a bit choppy and there were some funny sentences to fit the rhythm/rhyme of it. Despite that, it was all right. I think it could be a little ...

Cool... I liked it. I liked the tone of it and the flow... Very lyrical.

A toothbrush. Only once-empty indents of the ground hold to the substance they contained. First contemplation is to say that either solid aqua shouts existence or its latent being shows ...

The little snippet in the beginning doesn't really seem to be necessary... The reason for her complacency of course was the weather. I don't think you should go right out ...

Sureal: You look like what I expected... Yay for you! Nice hair by the way... :) Micah: Your kitten's so cute! And your brother too. And you're a nice complement ...

I guess the beginning is supposed to be trying to draw readers in and slightly sarcastic, but it seemed sort of cheesy, especially when you switch to first-person perspective in ...

Kind of blew right by me... Very descriptive and had great imagery.

[Welcome to YWS by the way.] Wow... This was very beautiful. I liked the metaphors a lot. You can really describe things elegantly. This flowed so well, too, like a ...

Just one thing that bugged me. don't wanna be just the flavor of the week. don't wanna be the next backstreet boys- you're in, and then you're out. The point ...

First of all, welcome to YWS! If you're anything like me, you'll like it here. ;) All right then. My secruity lost, Just a typo...security This felt really simple, but ...

I didn't really care much for the second to the last stanza, but the rest of it was very 'Oh my god... that was awesome'.

Is unmissable a word? Heh, it kind of distracted me because I was wondering if it was or not. Anyway... I liked it. It was really... cool... Couldn't really find ...

I liked the last two stanzas. Nice poem.