eastarcher

Look at your diction. Look at your line breaks (you end on weak words galore: in, the, and, etc.). First, your diction goes from...a dorm room and life there, to ...

Wow. This is really an incredible poem...and very, very simple. I loved the tone, and the opening lines, and the severity of the images even though they were brief. There ...

this second segment kind gives me the goosebumps, and flashbacks. All in all, a decent (long) read that must have taken a lot of thought and imagery to get right. ...

I don't like this one. I don't like it, I don't like it. Thanks in advance to anyone brave enough to tackle its atrocious length. 1 I’m going to need ...

I really like this one. The thunder is a great motif. It feels creepy, and, in the context of the poem, gives me chills. All of the imagery is that ...

The emotions here were expressed well, and I definitely felt them as I read the poem. With such a tried theme as unrequited love, it's easy to fall into self-righteousness ...

I have to say that you are very talented. There are many ways to present servitude and aging, and I think you chose yours well, with much tact. The imagery ...

I've changed the last one to "golden". The first three were intentional. I could easily put synonyms there, but I think I established a cool rhythm by using three different ...

A girl twists and ducks and Twirls through a field Cloaked in suncatching sunflowers Sunbathing in spinning and singing and Joy and youth Weaving wind around Green stalks and yellow ...

Oh my gosh. I read a lot of poems from unknown names online...and I have to say that this is one of the best, if not the best one I've ...

It is me, the writer. It's about planning a suicide and then realizing lamely that I cannot follow through. I started this as if it was going to be someone ...

Silk rope hung round his neck Touches residual Teen stubble Maybe it’s from the Wolf Spiders inhabiting His bathroom But I forget myself; Wolf Spiders do not Produce webs They ...