denj

Hey guys, it's been a while since I've posted and written. I just wrote this short story for school and I'd like to get some feedback. I tried to write ...

Hey Jalmoc, nice work here, especially for some free time in class. With that in mind, it's good, with only a couple issues. I'll go over those first. It was ...

Interesting little passage you have here. It is well-written overall, but a couple minor things I noticed. I could almost hear them whispering histories past stories of bravery and might... ...

This has to be one of the most interesting and original pieces I've read in a while. Really, really great job. When I saw the title, I had not heard ...

Very nice start to a story. I haven't played Left 4 Dead personally, but I'm familiar with the zombie apocalypse premise. You've done a good job with it. Now, for ...

Hey, BadNarrator, First off, very nice job. You've created a story with plenty of action and an entertaining premise. It did not fail to hold my attention, but there are ...

Thank you everyone for your reviews, they were all very helpful. Rebz- Thank you very much. A broken heart is kind of what I am trying to convey, along with ...

Hey there Baywolf, happy I stumbled on your writing here. First off, wow. That was my impression as I read more and more of this piece. It is really very ...

This looks to be the start to a very interesting story. I liked how you incorporated mystery, suspense, and almost a sense of confusion. I would do a comprehensive grammar ...

“Are you sure you want to go on?” I asked her anxiously as the operator checked our lap bar. “Yes, Daniel. You’ve asked me a million times.” She said To ...

Hey guys, I haven't posted here in quite a while, and I haven't had a chance to write much. Recently I've become interested in poetry, and this is one of ...

The world was black. An all consuming Should be "all-consuming" black. I was weightless. The darkness pushed in on my soul, my lungs were struggling Not a big deal, but ...

This poem is really not bad at all. It's short, simple, and descriptive. You've done a nice job of creating a sense of isolation and aloneness. As EliteHusky said, it ...

I couldn't recall the exact moment it happened, which likely benefitted me, for I would aim to cherish it for all time or strangle the thought for causing me the ...

Thank you for the comprehensive review, Wooster! I guess I have more changes to make than I thought! I can see how the wolves could come across, especially in the ...