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Ouch my head... I've heard of driving a point home but god please stop hitting my head it's painful! You keep telling us of the different way they dance, but ...

*Bang* That's my mind, you killed it with all these cliches. It's not even that well done. You go over so many of them. Next it's hardly original. Oh boohoo ...

At first I wasn't into this poem as it starts with a weak hook, but then it blossomed, pardon the pun into a wonderous imagery poem. I'm trying to think ...

Hmm, this struck as a first attempt at delving into the world of poetry. It an interesting idea don't be mistaken but the narrative just bores, I want to know ...

This is far from a new idea and you don't approach it with anything original, you tell us a story. This make it incredibly weak, as you tell us everything ...

This poem lacks something, you seem to tell too much. It seems all well and good but you don't show us the feeling and with that the ending is kinda ...

You get nothing but boredom from this, it's cliche and tedious. Again you forget most if not all puntuation only putting a few. It seems more like a rant doesn't ...

It's interesting but the meaning isn't exactly clear. But experimenting fun, just maybe try and somehow get a the meaning clearer in these few lines. Sure ya can manage this. ...

Didn't exactly get this, but it's wonderful imagery with exellent and intense langauge techniques. I can't comment on the subject since I can't quite understand it. Overall: This earns a ...

... Yeh... first rule of poetry 101, Grammar! Puntuation. Don't act like it our job to fix your grammar. You post this rather poor poem and to add insult to ...

I'm in agreement with most, you don't keep the readers interested and to add insult to injury you use and spew out cliches, it's not got a worth while hook, ...

Hmmm, God I'm noticing a pattern with ya now. You have a wonderful idea but ya cramp it in one stanza. You need to learn not to limit your imagination ...

If we were to get pregnant, we could and would handle it. Say that with hindsight and I'll believe you. ^_^ Heck, sex is overrated. :roll: Try saying that when ...

Hmm, from what I've read of your poetry it has a vaguely familar style each time, this isn't a good familarness I'm seeing. You keep making the same errors, telling ...

Maybe it's just me but you really love semi-colons. Not a bad thing... but this poem, you tell us too much, you need to show this. It's just weak and ...